[Video] 05.

[cueball]

[It isn't often Scratch opts for anything but text. White texting people is always funny. But, he does want to ask something important enough to warrant the lack of it.

Good day New Moore residents. I have an inquiry to make. As an alien who does not come from Earth and only understands the minimal requirement about humans and their culture for my work, it seems that this month a very popular holiday called "Christmas" is approaching.

I don't celebrate Christmas and the closest equivalent to it in my universe is called "12th Perigees Eve", which is celebrated differently among the class lines. I don't celebrate that either.

However from my understanding, part of the Christmas tradition for you humans is to wear horrible unflattering sweaters. The kind with an awful tacky design on it, terrible colors and is simply horrendous to look at.

I find it curious as to why such a tradition takes place at all. That said, I want to learn first hand about the bizarre human emotion you all refer to as "the spirit of Christmas".

Shortly put, my question is:



Which of these two is tackier, in your opinion? Please make note that the first is a sweater vest and the second has glowing lights installed in it.

[Apologies to unfortunate roommate Scott McCall who has to deal with seeing these atrocities the most of anyone, because Scratch is definitely going to wear at least one.]

Comments

[doublestripe]

Wear the sweatervest over the sweater if you want to be really really tacky, jawbreaker guy. That'll be spirited!

[cueball]

That's a bit much, even for me.

[doublestripe]

Okay do the blinky sweater then! The lights will reflect off your head.

[cueball]

My head doesn't work like that. It isn't shiny at all.

[doublestripe]

No? What's it m̧͈͉͔̝̺̖ͩ́͞a̟͙̋̅͢d̅ͤ̋e̮͚͙ͥ̐̈̅̈́ ̧̎̓͋͋͗͏̯̜̻̞̫͚oͩ͏̼̮uͯ͌̑̇̈ͤ̈̚ẗ̍ ò̶̞̬͇͔̪̆̓f̢̛̗͌ͨ̓̚?̷̞̪̗̱̻͉̩ͮ̈ͅ I thought it was a jawbreaker.

[fuckincakewake]

if u ruin christmas i will rip out your organs with a shoe horn and shove it down your nonexistent throat
you thought the pumpkin pie was bad
no idea what ur in 4 if you mess with babys first xmas

[fuckincakewake]

i gave up drinking so im in a pissy mood
but pretty sure u still deserve that

[cueball]

How did you go from sweaters to ruining Christmas? I don't plan to do anything like that.

[You trick two people into blowing themselves up to create the power source for your boss, an ultimate evil, and everyone thinks you're going to ruin everything good! GEEZ.]

But it is good to hear you are taking the path to sobriety.

[fuckincakewake]

u ruined promcoming
theres literally no limit to ur ruiniousness
and yeah well its not 4 u so wtfever
harder than originally anticipated

wow i totally forgot i was doing this textless style for a sec

[cueball]

Holding grudges isn't healthy.

[Just sayin Roxy.]

You grew very accustomed to it, so naturally it will be a challenge. I suggest not letting anyone tempt you.

[dontmccallmyname]

I think the lights might take the second one from tacky to kind of awesome?

[cueball]

You must be joking.

[Scott what kind of roommate are you that you don't think it's hideous?]

[dontmccallmyname]

It lights up. It's like you're wearing a Christmas tree.

[dontmccallmyname]

Hey, are we getting a Christmas tree, or are you really just in it for the sweaters?

[cueball]

And that's why it's terrible. Not 'awesome', as you put it.

[cueball]

If you want a tree I won't object to it. It would be a way of furthering my understanding of this holiday.

[Plus, trees are green. Green is always a good color to have around the house.]

[dontmccallmyname]

I think we have different definitions of awesome. Where'd you get it, anyway? I kind of want to...I mean, not for me, but I think I know someone who might appreciate it.

[maiditoutalive]

ah yes
you would join in the holiday that involves an old man spying on everyone

[cueball]

There is a very big difference between me and the beloved human fictional character dubbed Santa Claus.

For instance, my presents are much better than his.

[maiditoutalive]

i highly doubt that
i do not even know how you would ever manage to convince anybody that was true

[cueball]

Once I gave a pony to a girl. She liked it so much it was dead within a couple minutes.

video;

[ohmycod]

Dude.

Your head. What. Your head.

video;

[cueball]

Yes. It's quite lovely, isn't it?

[He doesn't get everyone's obsession with pointing out his head, but it is a nice head.]

video;

[ohmycod]

It's so...glubbin' stupid. That thing'll look like shit hangin' from my wall.

video;

[cueball]

Don't worry, it won't be hanging from your wall anytime soon.