backdated to 3am, morning of the 29th // if you got werewolf problems...

[andagoodsoldier]

i wrote an app that will make your phone go to full volume and emit the kind of high-frequency noise that makes dogs whimper from two miles out. humans can't hear it, so don't comment back to say it isn't working or some shit.

hopeithurts.apk

find the file on your phone, click it, install it, open it within hearing-range of one of the furry monsters, close the app to shut off the noise.

tested and confirmed working on at least one of these fuckers, though i ended up turning it off when i made it to a safe spot since idk what the battery is like on this phone yet.

if you need help with the app i can give limited support for at least a couple of hours. in fact, i have nothing better to do since my test subject chased me up a light pole so… lemme know how it goes

EDIT: whaddaya know, the app doesn't work on every werewolf. given the data i have access to the success rate seems to be about 50%. feel free to tinker with the code if you think you can do any better, jerks.

EDIT EDIT: IT MIGHT JUST MAKE THEM ANGRIER, USE AT YOUR OWN RISK

Comments

[notvictorious]

That's helpful.

[oftpartitioned]

IT DOESNT WORK ON THIS ONE

[oftpartitioned]

FIX IT

[andagoodsoldier]

is the app open?

[oftpartitioned]

no i closed it to conserve battery life YES

[andagoodsoldier]

make sure to give me 5/5 on the app store

[andagoodsoldier]

well, i'm out of ideas.

[andagoodsoldier]

no, here's one: you should probably run away.

[oftpartitioned]

YOU THINK???

[andagoodsoldier]

gl with that buddy

[notvictorious]

Not if it doesn't work.

[andagoodsoldier]

i never said it worked on every werewolf in existence

[andagoodsoldier]

you still alive?

[oftpartitioned]

course I am, I'm immortal

dickbag

[notvictorious]

It was inferred.

[andagoodsoldier]

kay i was going to be concerned for your safety but now i don't have to give a shit.

[andagoodsoldier]

by me saying i'd tried it on one wolfed-out douchebag? yeah, that's some exhaustive testing i totally didn't do.

[notvictorious]

One test? You're as bad as Apple.

[oftpartitioned]

SO GLAD I FREED YOU FROM THAT BURDEN

[andagoodsoldier]

okay, one, you get what you pay for.

two, go fuck yourself

[notvictorious]

Welcome to the island, thank for the dog whistle scam app.

[andagoodsoldier]

np

((no idea who he's talking to))

[detectivewonder]

Quick coding. Nice work.

THEY'RE GOING TO LOOK BACK ON THIS AND CRY

[andagoodsoldier]

thanks, i try.

Re: THEY'RE GOING TO LOOK BACK ON THIS AND CRY

[detectivewonder]

Where'd you learn to code like that?