[ VIDEO ] - Inside a generic apartment room

[moriarty_was_real]

Petty vandalism? Really now? So you've mentally regressed to the level of particularly slow children. I suppose I'll have to switch tactics to accommodate.

I'm offering a bounty on the heads of those who can't resist destroying perfectly good resources for fun. They will be brought to the elementary school, handcuffed to uncomfortably small desks, and forced to endure several straight hours of my most excruciating mathematics lectures.

NOW will you behave yourselves?

Comments

[moriarty_was_real]

I've somehow managed to convince myself that I'm a fictional character trapped on a tiny magic island populated largely by the exceptionally stupid, probably because I'm in a coma somewhere with massive brain damage from a botched suicide attempt.

Try me.

[badnewsboy]

That's quite an interesting theory, though if they want to make the argument that we're fake, the same could be said of them, correct?

As for me, I'm an Asgardian, so the realm of explanations for my appearance are endless.

[moriarty_was_real]

So you come from the realm of the gods? What does that make you?

[badnewsboy]

I thought you'd make the connection.

[moriarty_was_real]

I thought you were the one telling the story.

[badnewsboy]

Not all stories are so straight-forward. They'd get boring, otherwise.

[moriarty_was_real]

Too bad you're hopeless as a storyteller. This one just did.

[badnewsboy]

How very unfortunate.

[moriarty_was_real]

And so predictable.

[The transmission cuts off.]