You never know. Hang on, just give me five minutes.
[Aradia switches it off, so she can make a quick stop before she gets there. So that, when she comes in, she can make a beeline for Laura and drop a big tub of chocolate ice cream right in her lap along with a plastic spoon, before she settles right down next to Laura like it ain't no big thing.]
[ Laura stares at her briefly for a few moments, in an attempt to remember is this what friends do? She is uncomfortable, but it doesn't stop her from reaching for the ice cream and taking out a small bite. Yes, she thinks, this is what friends do. ] I am worried. I did not go to homecoming. I could have saved that person.
[This is, Aradia is pretty sure, what friends do. At least, she's sort of pieced out that ice cream makes everything better, and she'd argue that it can only improve a situation, so.
And she is old hat at this sort of conversation anyway. This is not even a surprising train of logic, this is the Karkat Vantas Maneuver.]
There are always plenty of things you could have done. There are always plenty of things anyone could have done. But the one thing you couldn't have done is known it would happen. So why are you worried?
[She has to think of a way to say this as delicately as possible. This isn't Karkat, she can't just talk over him and sweep aside his objections because he's ridiculous anyway and she can get away with it and she knows she's right. Laura does not have the benefit of that understanding.]
You can try, yes. I don't mean that as a slight on your abilities. But it's not really possible for you take responsibility for everything that happens to everyone. There will be things you can't be there for, things you can prevent and things you can't, either because they have to go that way or there's a limit to how much you can do, how many choices you can make to insure an possible outcome. I know that probably isn't very easy to hear! But I think if you spend so much time worrying about what you could have done, even if it's understandable, it doesn't benefit anybody. Nobody would blame you for not being there but yourself.
[Time traveler logic. Of course this doesn't apply to her; in theory she could probably make anything happen, but there would be consequences and doomed timelines and she knows, sometimes, people die, and there's nothing to be done, and it's not easy.]
[ She takes another bite of the ice cream (oddly surprised that it does help a little bit), contemplating this in silence for a few long moments. When she finally does speak, it is slow and deliberate. She, too, is trying to find the right way to say this. ] But if I can do something, I should. I have done many bad things. I want to do good things. But you are right. I cannot do good things if I simply think about what I could have done.
Yes, exactly! You can't think about what you could have done, or what you should have done, because you didn't, and you couldn't be expected to know and you shouldn't be expected to save everyone. I could have prevented it, if I had known, but I didn't, and there's not really anything I can do about that-
[Probably, timelines are so odd here, she doesn't quite get how to navigate with her abilities so limited-]
- any more than you can now. I've been trying to explain this to Karkat forever, he does the same kind of thing. Everything that goes wrong, he thinks that it's his fault, and maybe sometimes it sort of is if you want to look at it that way, because he chose to do one thing when he could have chosen another. But nobody will hold that against him, and there isn't any way he could have known how it would turn out. So it's pointless for him to just sit there beating himself up for it. You never get anywhere if you do that, and you can't assume responsibility for everything and everybody's choices.
Great! I don't and he's still an asshole. Who the hell does he think he is talking to you like that. Does he just wait for people he thinks are vulnerable and fucking spring on them?
No, no, no. Thinking like that doesn't work. It just screws you over.
[Something about this whole situation is really familiar. Why is this so familiar?]
You can't take a responsibility like that on yourself. It doesn't even make sense.
[In fact, he's pretty sure he's had conversations like this before, but nothing immediately springs to mind. The elusive sensation is almost as irritating as the elusive words.]
Augh.
[Which might be why frustration finally starts to bite his voice.]
Dammit, no. Wait, wait, hold on. I know what this sounds like. It probably sounds like I'm getting mad at you? I'm not. I'm the opposite of mad at you. Or maybe not the opposite since the opposite of mad is happy or calm or something, I--oh God, no. I'm not doing this. What am I even talking about? Jesus Christ. I don't know what I'm trying to say. What the fuck is my problem? It's not like this should be hard!
[It was a good run though. A whole two minutes without becoming impossibly moody!]
Look, I'm done. I'm not talking about this anymore. Just don't do anything that might help that asshole use you. I don't even care about the consequences. I don't know you; I don't know what you can do; and I don't care about that either. The thing is: you're not some inanimate object specifically crafted for this guy's use whenever the hell he wants, which is obviously what he wants from you! I mean, fuck. What a douche.
We were all there, m'lady. Do not assume complete responsibility for something that certainly wasn't your fault. Those of us who were there, despite all the unique abilities we may have, were not able to prevent it, either.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
audio; private
Hey. Do you want to talk about it?
audio; private
But yes.
no subject
[Aradia switches it off, so she can make a quick stop before she gets there. So that, when she comes in, she can make a beeline for Laura and drop a big tub of chocolate ice cream right in her lap along with a plastic spoon, before she settles right down next to Laura like it ain't no big thing.]
Ok! Talk.
no subject
no subject
And she is old hat at this sort of conversation anyway. This is not even a surprising train of logic, this is the Karkat Vantas Maneuver.]
There are always plenty of things you could have done. There are always plenty of things anyone could have done. But the one thing you couldn't have done is known it would happen. So why are you worried?
no subject
no subject
You can try, yes. I don't mean that as a slight on your abilities. But it's not really possible for you take responsibility for everything that happens to everyone. There will be things you can't be there for, things you can prevent and things you can't, either because they have to go that way or there's a limit to how much you can do, how many choices you can make to insure an possible outcome. I know that probably isn't very easy to hear! But I think if you spend so much time worrying about what you could have done, even if it's understandable, it doesn't benefit anybody. Nobody would blame you for not being there but yourself.
[Time traveler logic. Of course this doesn't apply to her; in theory she could probably make anything happen, but there would be consequences and doomed timelines and she knows, sometimes, people die, and there's nothing to be done, and it's not easy.]
no subject
no subject
Yes, exactly! You can't think about what you could have done, or what you should have done, because you didn't, and you couldn't be expected to know and you shouldn't be expected to save everyone. I could have prevented it, if I had known, but I didn't, and there's not really anything I can do about that-
[Probably, timelines are so odd here, she doesn't quite get how to navigate with her abilities so limited-]
- any more than you can now. I've been trying to explain this to Karkat forever, he does the same kind of thing. Everything that goes wrong, he thinks that it's his fault, and maybe sometimes it sort of is if you want to look at it that way, because he chose to do one thing when he could have chosen another. But nobody will hold that against him, and there isn't any way he could have known how it would turn out. So it's pointless for him to just sit there beating himself up for it. You never get anywhere if you do that, and you can't assume responsibility for everything and everybody's choices.
no subject
no subject
no subject
The question is, what do you intend to do now?
no subject
no subject
no subject
he's making a bit of an assumption here XD
Keeping the people of this island safe is my highest priority right now.
no subject
no subject
I have my... doubts, shall we say... about some of the government employees. But those are a matter of repeated public record.
no subject
no subject
Teaching as many as I can how to fight, themselves, has been the best I can offer so far.
I could always use a teaching assistant.
[All Audio Unless Otherwise Specified. LET'S TRY THIS NO FONT THING TO KEEP IN THEME.]
Audio; SURPRISINGLY NICE OF YOU KARKAT
[ LOOK, THAT GUY WAS GOING AFTER VRISKA. HE IS NURSING A GRUDGE. ]
no subject
no subject
If he was up to any kind of good, he'd have told you it wasn't your fucking fault.
no subject
oh look, a text message.
no subject
no subject
[HYPOCRISY HYPOCRISY sorry Laura, all of this was probably spoken without much breathing room.]
[Something about this whole situation is really familiar. Why is this so familiar?]
You can't take a responsibility like that on yourself. It doesn't even make sense.
[In fact, he's pretty sure he's had conversations like this before, but nothing immediately springs to mind. The elusive sensation is almost as irritating as the elusive words.]
Augh.
[Which might be why frustration finally starts to bite his voice.]
Dammit, no. Wait, wait, hold on. I know what this sounds like. It probably sounds like I'm getting mad at you? I'm not. I'm the opposite of mad at you. Or maybe not the opposite since the opposite of mad is happy or calm or something, I--oh God, no. I'm not doing this. What am I even talking about? Jesus Christ. I don't know what I'm trying to say. What the fuck is my problem? It's not like this should be hard!
[It was a good run though. A whole two minutes without becoming impossibly moody!]
Look, I'm done. I'm not talking about this anymore. Just don't do anything that might help that asshole use you. I don't even care about the consequences. I don't know you; I don't know what you can do; and I don't care about that either. The thing is: you're not some inanimate object specifically crafted for this guy's use whenever the hell he wants, which is obviously what he wants from you! I mean, fuck. What a douche.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject