thoughtformed | ten

Heeelllo~ Did you see what The Doctor gave me? Because it's the greatest thing ever, okay? It's so big and warm and- [ he's waving an end of this thing at the camera with a stupidly happy grin on his face ]

...Wait, I had a purpose to this post. EHEM. Right! So. How was your Christmas? Was it amazing? Mine was amazing. The greatest I ever had, even! I hope all your hearts grew two sizes.

You know what you all need? To give yourself a wonderful post-Christmas gift, and to start the New Year off right: Big scarf things too! But not just any big scarf things. You need thneeds. What is a thneed? Well, dear New Moore, if you haven't already had the joy of finding out previously-- let me enlighten you!

Ta~da~da~daaaaa: [ what is he holding up now? it's that ridiculously fluffy pink thing he has that's design doesn't seem to make any sense at all. guys we're in seuss territory. buckle your seatbelts there's going to be a rhyming musical number while he twists and turns that thing into pink-fluffy versions of others things. you all saw this coming. ]

This thing is a thneed. A thneed's a fine-something-that-all-people-need!
It's a shirt. It's a sock. It's a glove, It's a hat.
But it has other uses. Oh yes, far beyond that!
There's about a million bajillion uses or so-
So listen carefully to some so you know!
It puts out campfires, it wards of vampires
But not Conrad.
It bends into shapes, makes fancy drapes!
For this season it can be a sweater!
Next season a shirt, skirt-- fits any weather.
Use it as a sled to slide down that hill
Eat it as a soup, make a giant windmill!
Big snowball shooter ~ Seat for your scooter!
Runny nose wiper or reusable diaper
It's reversible and versatile.
Washable and responsible!
Completely collapsible! WiFi Compatible!
Don't need a large, medium, or small.
It's uniquely designed for a true one-size-fits-all.
Also the smell is wonderfully sweet
And it comes in 84 colors- isn't that neat?
You might need one. Oh you definitely do.
Only 3.98, buy one-- Heck by two!

Ehem.. [ and then he lowers his voice and quickly states the following: ]
Thneeds are all natural, made of one-hundred-and-ten-percent truffula tuft and humanely collected from the trees using a giant comb with previous permission from not one but two forest guardians. All seeds that wind up in my hands in the process will be carefully kept for emergency situations unless requested. All fruit that winds up in my hands will be used to make delicious pancake breakfasts which can be purchased during the mornings at Piece-A Pizza for 7.37-- open 9am. Ask about the jumbo pizza while you're there. 10% of profit goes to charity. No animals were harmed in the making of this song.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It's because you're shy, isn't it?

[He's doing a great job of pushing all her buttons right now, and it's getting her rather flustered. She rocks back, waving her hands in a fluttery denial.]

O-h no, it's not that--! Er... Well, it's not entirely that, I suppose.

[Cursed blush. Why wouldn't it leave her alone?]

I just... don't... Advertisements ought to have pretty models - they certainly sell better.

But you're pretty. Just because you have big square glasses doesn't make you unpretty, you know.

I don't see where you're coming from.

[Oh sweet stars, he was getting very good at hitting all her buttons. She didn't - quite - resort to covering her face with her hands, but she thought about it very hard. Instead she just shakes her head, speechless.]

Th-thank you. Ah... very much. I'm, um, I'm not very comfortable. Er. With pictures, I mean. Or compliments, really.

[ He was naively pushing her buttons without really meaning to at first but now he's curiously smiling at her. So. Sheska = Nice + Not Ugly In The Slightest. Therefore: Sheska = Amusingly Shy. ]

Or compliments? You're just being silly. You should feel good about compliments. It's nothing to get all fumbled up about.

They're not something I get very often! I don't really-- I'm not-- I mean, it's not as though I'm something special.

But that's all beside the point. What I was saying was that you should have someone not me model them for you and make a flier, or a catalog.

You're special to me. [ shrugs ]

Hmmmm, okay. On topic. Do you think it would work? I guess I could print fliers to stick everywhere...

[That caught her off-guard, even with the preceding conversation, robbing her of speech and stilling her nervous motions. She was special... to him? Did that mean...? Was she reading too deeply into it, here? She knows she's a hopeless romantic - key word hopeless - but could it possibly be? No, that's just ridiculous. No one could possibly think of her as dating material. And wasn't he going out with that girl Roxy? She latches onto the subject change with desperate tenacity.]

Fliers, or commercials, maybe? Radio spots? Maybe you could convince someone to host a fashion show! Clothes and accessories all made of thneeds!

[ He's giving her a funny look. She seemed to really jump at the topic, huh? He's wondering if he said something wrong there. ...Nah. He wouldn't have said anything wrong. All well. ]

Do people even listen to the radio around here?

We do at the precinct! Usually just on low in the background, but we play it in the lobby too. And the coffee shops and restaurants often play the radio. Don't the salons and barber shops, too? Would that be worth it, do you think?

My Thneed song playing on the radio would be a good idea. Yeah, I think I'll do it.

Good luck! I hope it helps. [She smiles with genuine feeling.] If there's anything I can do to help, let me know, won't you?

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