happy newmooreiversary to me

[callbacks]

hags
tg (dave strider)

[Edit five minutes later (also GIF WARNING):]


Online Photo Editor

TO: cool souji
SUBJ: when you get home

yo check the fridge

Comments

[thneed]

Work. 11.23

These are fun. What if I wore these all the time?

[callbacks]

theyve got my stamp of approval
bro?

[brotimaeus]

for a price like that im in.
shits classy as fuck.

[callbacks]

maybe we could recreate the gangsta chain too
dude ive got to find a way to make blingee real
we need our paws on all of this shit

[brotimaeus]

we can do it, kid.
we can make it happen.

[callbacks]

if au grownup me found a way to make artifact grist without an alchemiter then i can too
real life blingee definitely calls for artifact grist
christ bro this is it
i found my science

[brotimaeus]

youre doing it dave.
youre living the dream.

[callbacks]

clear a space on the mantel for all the nobel science prizes im gonna bring home

[brotimaeus]

are you kiddin me.
im building a cabinet.

[callbacks]

with a glass front?

[brotimaeus]

as if you even have to ask.

[callbacks]

this is the most hideously pretentious suburban mama thing
are you going to buy an suv with bumper stickers that say my bro is a junior pixelphysics bee champ and ship me out to the nerdier kind of nerd conventions and memorize my gpa to the tenth digit

[brotimaeus]

ill even give you apples to take to school and attend all your soccer games.
write your name on your lunch every morning.

[callbacks]

hjelp
my sides
im crying
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

[brotimaeus]

leave a bright red lipstick kiss on your forehead and wipe the tears from my eyes as you head off on school trips.
then go home and put on my apron to clean the house and inevitably find all the porn you have stashed under your mattress.

[callbacks]

hahahaha
like youd do anything but brush a manly tear of pride if you did
me showing interest in the family business and all

[brotimaeus]

i may brush away the manliest of manly tears with the frilly edge of my apron.
my lil' man all growin up and shit.

[callbacks]

wasnt i like
three the first time i looked at porn anyway
that cant be a meaningful milestone at this point

[brotimaeus]

jesus christ dave.
stop ruining the fantasy.

[callbacks]

oh my bad
carry on
i think the next part was your misty eyes when i moved into my very own picket fenced house and got to work on making my two point five babies

[brotimaeus]

yes.
then i can retire and buy a boat.

[callbacks]

a retire from what
and b what would you even do with a boat

[brotimaeus]

the question, dave, is what couldnt i do.

[callbacks]

you probably couldnt get real good wifi on it for one

[brotimaeus]

its gonna be a really big boat.