This is not the time I was looking for.

[stopwatchesandcoffee]

Mairwyn? Mairwyn, the device isn't working properly. Where did you go.

Mairwyn?

It's dropped me off in the wrong place.

What's going on? As much as I love coffee, now is neither the time or the place. If this is you trying to remind me of what would have been, I already got that message.

This isn't funny.

Mairwyn, answer me!

Blast. Is this thing broken?

Comments

[chronosexual]

Gotcha. Now. Shall we do this the easy way or the fun way? I'd rather you not be struggling when I put the handcuffs on.

[allons_y_alonso]

What if banana split was a clever euphemism? In that case, would the handcuffs be more of an... elective?

[chronosexual]

That depends. You bringing your boyfriend?

[allons_y_alonso]

Is it better if I do or if I don't?

Also, technically speaking, he's not my boyfriend. Bachelors, after all.

[chronosexual]

Bachelor is just a term for woman-less. 'Confirmed Bachelor' is pretty much universal for, 'I like boys', after all.

Well, let's just say that if you do bring him, I might be easier to convince to let these rather big and nasty files I've got just... disappear.

[allons_y_alonso]

Then we'll both be there!

Although, I do have a dinner date first, if you don't mind. Have to stay ahead in points, after all.

[chronosexual]

Well it's not like you're going anywhere else.

[neverstops]

You might have a dinner date, but I have a beach date and later a tour of the island. We'll see.

Now what's this about Banana Splits? You weren't really going to leave me out of the fun were you?

[allons_y_alonso]

I'm just trying to make sure we're not arrested!

By my count, my one date to your two followed by joint banana splits with Strappy (while we talk about Villengard still leaves me ahead by one!

[chronosexual]

How sweet, I've got a nickname already.

[allons_y_alonso]

You never introduced yourself!

Or if you did, I wasn't paying attention!

Besides, Strappy is what we call all the Time Agents we meet!

[chronosexual]

And I thought I was just special.

Call me Jack Harkness. Figure it'd sound better coming out of you than 'strappy', anyway.

[neverstops]

I don't know. Strappy was growing on me. Jack, you say? Jack. Jack.

You don't much look like a Jack.

[chronosexual]

Probably because I'm not. But it's a name, and it's the only one you're getting from me, handsome.

[allons_y_alonso]

Jack Harkness. Sounds vaguely familiar, somehow.

Vortex manipulators are a little crude, though, don't you think? A little show-offy, hands-free... Look what I'm doing! I can jump through space and time with nothing but this large piece of phallic proxy technology!

[chronosexual]

They're small, efficient, and easier to conceal than... seriously? a police box? Usually the phone booths I find people travelling in are red.

And what about it is phallic in the least?

[allons_y_alonso]

We're just having a slight malfunction with the chameleon circuit.... honestly, no-one pays attention to her, usually!

And I did say phallic proxy, not phallic symbol. You can't tell me you don't look at another Agent's wrist strap when you bump into one another.

[chronosexual]

Ohhh now see you're just trying to make me feel insecure. Clever, you.

Whether I do or not is not an of your business, and therefore, your assumption will go unanswered.

[allons_y_alonso]

Have it your way, then.

[chronosexual]

Oh, well in that case, I think I'd like to have you.

[allons_y_alonso]

Buy me a drink first!

[chronosexual]

It's a date.

[allons_y_alonso]

Brilliant!

Private -> Bachelor One

[neverstops]

How did he manage that? No one landlocks our girl.

Private -> Bachelor Two

[allons_y_alonso]

Don't know yet. Time Agent, though. They get toys.

Still, if we can get him juicy enough on the local ethanol products, maybe we can find out!

Private -> Bachelor One

[neverstops]

Right! Mission accepted. Get the Time Agent lacquered.

Private -> Bachelor Two

[allons_y_alonso]

Possibly even shellacked!