IMAGINE THIS HAPPENING SHORTLY AFTER THE ANNOUNCEMENT, BECAUSE THAT'S PROBABLY WHEN IT DID.

[ihateyouetc]

HA HA HA!
OH MAN, LOOK AT THESE SPACES BETWEEN EVERY "HA" PRECISELY PUNCTUATING THE IMPRUDENT INDIVIDUALITY INTENDED BEHIND EACH OF THE TWO LETTER EXPRESSIONS COMPOSING THE MIRTHFUL ONOMATOPOEIA I JUST WROTE.
EXCEPT THE "HA" ENDING IN A SHOUT POLE.
THAT ONE TYPICALLY DENOTES "YELLING" OR IT CAN BE AN EXCLAMATION OF "EXCITEMENT" AND "MERRIMENT."
WHICH ISN'T ACTUALLY WHAT I'M DOING AT THE MOMENT.
I'M SAYING HA HA, VERY FUCKING FUNNY IN THE WAY THAT CONVEYS "HA HA, FUCK YOU."
WHO RIGGED THIS.
I WILL FUCKING FIND YOU.
I'M NOT "ACCEPTING" SHIT AT THIS MISERABLE EXCUSE FOR A GATHERING WHERE HUMANS USUALLY EXHIBIT A DISTINCT LACK OF TALENT IN THE ART OF "DANCING" WHILE AWKWARDLY FUMBLING AROUND EACH OTHER WITH WHAT I ASSUME IS THE INTENT OF EVOLVING ENOUGH NERVE TO PUT THEIR MOUTHS ON EACH OTHER BEFORE THE NIGHT IS OVER.
IT'S BAD ENOUGH I ACTUALLY AGREED TO GO.

Comments

[dontmccallmyname]

Yeah, I know. I'm not sure there's even that many people on the island.

[roseate]

I dunno.
HIC.
There could be a lovt of daves.

[dontmccallmyname]

I only know the one.

[roseate]

No there are two its terr ible.
Sometimest heres more they multipy.
Like rabbits.
Rabits who can time travel.
God so many Daves my head hrurts.

[dontmccallmyname]

That...does sound like a problem.

[dontmccallmyname]

Time travel, though?

[roseate]

Oh god.
Okay here si the skinny ver sion.
Blah blah god teer blah blah all you need to know is,
Shenangicans.
*Shenanigans.
And magic.

[dontmccallmyname]

Oh. Yeah, totally.

[No, but. Totally.]

Always shenanigans.

[callbacks]

i already said i only voted once
what kind of unpatriotic hater of democracy do you take me for

[roseate]

Thta's true.
Yuo do have a crush on Barack.

1/SEVERAL. SORRY SCOTT.

[ihateyouetc]

OF COURSE THERE'S THAT MANY PEOPLE ON THE ISLAND.
THE THING IS HOW MANY OF THEM ACTUALLY KNOW ME???
NONE OF THEM ACTUALLY KNOW ME.

[ihateyouetc]

I MEAN I GUESS SOME OF THE HUMANS ACTUALLY KNOW ME AND A COUPLE TROLLS TOO SINCE WE'RE FRIENDS.
BUT OTHER THAN THAT NOBODY ACTUALLY KNOWS ME.
OR YOU I GUESS, SINCE I HAVE NO CLUE WHO THE FUCK YOU ARE.
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN OTHER PEOPLE DON'T KNOW YOU?

[ihateyouetc]

OH GOD DAMMIT.
YOU WEREN'T SERIOUS.

[ihateyouetc]

I TOTALLY JUST JUMPED "THE GUN" HERE AND TOOK YOUR JOKE SERIOUSLY AND RAN WITH IT TO COMPLAIN ABOUT SOMETHING COMPLETELY UNRELATED.

[ihateyouetc]

DOES ANY OF WHAT I JUST SAID EVEN MAKE SENSE???
IT'S LIKE I DRANK THE HUMAN FRUIT DRINK WITH THE SPIKES IN IT OR WHATEVER YOU GUYS CALL IT WHEN THE HUMAN FRUIT DRINK BOWL HAS ALCOHOL IN IT.

[ihateyouetc]

AND I DID A LITTLE BUT HONESTLY THAT SHIT TASTED DISGUSTING.

[ihateyouetc]

I DON'T GET HOW EVERYONE ELSE DOESN'T NOTICE THERE'S SOMETHING IN IT.
IT WAS REALLY OBVIOUS.
BUT I GUESS MAYBE NOT ALL OF THE HUMAN FRUIT DRINK BOWLS HAVE THE SAME STUFF IN IT?
SO MAYBE THERE WAS ONE THAT DIDN'T TASTE AS MUCH LIKE ASS.

[ihateyouetc]

EITHER WAY I FEEL LIKE I REALLY DODGED A BULLET HERE.
EVERYONE I KNOW IS LIKE TWO STEPS AWAY FROM FALLING DOWN A THIRD TIME.

OK DONE.

[ihateyouetc]

WHATEVER.
WHO EVEN CARES.
SORRY I RUINED YOUR JOKE.
EVALUATING IT IN RETROSPECT, IT WAS KIND OF FUNNY.

[dontmccallmyname]

No, uh, I actually wasn't sure if there were that many people on the island.

[dontmccallmyname]

...but you made some pretty good points about the breakdown of the population?

[dontmccallmyname]

You definitely didn't sound drunk. Not that I'd know since I...anyway. You're good. It's fine, dude.

GOD I'M SO SLOW.

[ihateyouetc]

WAIT, SERIOUSLY?
HOW LONG HAVE YOU EVEN BEEN HERE.
THIS WHOLE PLACE IS FILLED WITH WHAT I'D CALL "JOLLY RED VACATION ASSHOLE'S HUGE ITEM OF CLOTHING MADE TO COVER ONE'S LOWER EXTREMITIES FILLED WITH SHITTY PEPPERMINT CANDY" PEOPLE.
THE HAVE PERSONALITIES IF YOU TALK TO THEM BUT OTHERWISE THEY DON'T REALLY ENGAGE.
IT'S KIND OF WEIRD IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT.

i promise youre not slower than me though

[dontmccallmyname]

Filled with—a what? Oh, like, just a lot of different people. Yeah.

I've been here like a month, now, but I guess I still don't know a lot of people.

WE'LL FIND OUT YET!!

[ihateyouetc]

WELL THAT AND EXCEPT FOR ALL THE SO-CALLED "FICTIONAL" PEOPLE, THEY SEEM PRETTY GENERIC.
I'M GOING TO MAKE THIS COMPARISON EASY.
DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES.