(no subject)

[arachnologist]

... okay, this is -- not okay. At all. This is -- you can't take me away from my dad's funeral and tell me I'm not -- not real, what is....

This is insane. This is the--

No. I'm not okay with this and I don't want to stay here. Do you understand that I have-- places to be? My family --

... no, okay. Fine. I can deal with this. If I have to, I will. So. [ DEEP BREATH. ] My name is Gwen. Gwen Stacy. If we're all -- fictional, I can only assume it's possible that people I know have been brought here too and told the same thing. So, iiiiif my name is familiar to you? Now's the time to say so. Otherwise?

[ DEEPER BREATH. ]

I'm. Going to go sit down. Somewhere. If anyone needs me, I'll just be. Yeah. So. Thanks.

Comments

[arachnologist]

Yeah. Maybe -- text me in a couple days? Oh, I'll need to -- give you my number, god, it's weird that they give us free phones, isn't it? Where do they get the money?

[unmasking]

I actually think it's weirder that they apparently give people places to live and food and all that. Maybe it's meant to keep people happy. Kinda makes you wonder what they did ten years ago. Did they give out Playstation 2s because that was all the fad?

[arachnologist]

[ That -- makes her huff a quiet laugh, stop that Peter. ]

I know, I just -- the phone just struck me. Everything about it is bizarre. The social services here must be extraordinary. How do they-- allocate the taxes, or-- or regulate any of it, I mean, town council meetings must be a riot--

I mean, there's obviously a purpose to all of it. They want to keep us connected, happy, supplied, pretty much -- taken care of. It's way too utopian for me to be comfortable with.

[unmasking]

[He kind of pauses, dumbfounded, for a moment. His Gwen is smart on the social movement scale, but she's all sass and rebellion and FIGHT THE MAN and this Gwen is ... not that. He huffs out a "huh" as she goes on because really he can't help himself.]

I'm wondering if we should look outside of logic. I know, I know, don't go on about conspiracy theories, but—look, this is like the Bermuda Triangle kinda. Isn't it? I mean, if you stopped and thought about what exactly was lingering in the Bermuda Triangle, wouldn't you think of a place that would have Superman and people who apparently know Batman and would somehow think it's a brilliant idea to have not one but two Peter Parkers who somehow don't look exactly the same, so we can't even throw out potential cloning as a part of this strange island's activity?

[And he ... actually took appropriate pauses while talking, but he did babble a lot of that off.]

I was always afraid of 1984 coming true, but I always found the year in the book kind of relieving, considering.

[arachnologist]

[ She is the policeman's daughter. She is brilliant and upstanding. She is fierce in a quiet way, that manifests loudly only when there are lizard monsters threatening her boyfriend. She carries on.

And she listens quietly to what he has to say, thinking it over before responding. ]

It's kind of -- fantastical. They're telling us when we get here that we're not fictional anymore, and -- there's actually all these fictional characters here! They're practically rubbing it in our faces. Look, see, told you! Here's Superman. [ Blows out a heavy breath. ] I don't think you're wrong. I've got definite Bermuda Triangle vibes going on. So much convenience and coincidence in one place--

Then again, I have to admit that I really don't like the, um. The alternatives. To their official story, I mean. Once you go down that rabbit hole, I -- I think it's pretty dark. And pretty disturbing.

[unmasking]

And very, very existential.

[He sighs, raising a hand to rub at the back of his neck.]

Or it could be that we're all on a major drug trip. I mean, that's what that book is, right? A metaphor for a drug trip? I think I'd prefer that than the existential awkward alternatives.

[arachnologist]

Actually, no. It was a commentary on abstract mathematics.

[ Said somewhat off-handedly before she mentally gets her shit together again: ]

Um-- yeah. I could stand to hold off on a double dose of existential crises for right now. I mean, it's -- worth figuring out. Absolutely. In fact, it needs to be. But, honestly, right now, what I need more is a place to sleep and a change of clothes. They're, um -- I've been hearing about a hotel, did anyone tell you?

[unmasking]

—You know about abstract mathematics?

[There's an eagerness in his voice, he can't help himself.]

I think I saw someone around talking about it. I was going to follow the so-called hordes of people.

[arachnologist]

[ With somewhat blank surprise: ]

I kind of have to, I work for-- er, I mean, I did work for ... for the foremost mind on cross-species genetics. [ Her expression twists and she shakes her head. ] Um. Let's not talk about that. That's-- you know what, actually, maybe I will join you. Soonish? Like -- an hour?

[unmasking]

[He mouths the "cross-species" genetics thing and holds back the "Was that Norman Osborn?" question, because it seems important to ask. He'll ask ... later. Yes.]

An hour sounds good. I'm gonna go explain almost two-hundred years of technological advances to a guy from 1832 who thinks I got out of the box called his smart phone, but I should be there on time.

[arachnologist]

... wow. Yyyyyou have -- fun with that? I mean. Good luck. I'll text you.

[unmasking]

It can't be that bad, right?

But yeah, I'll look forward to it.

[about an hour later]

[arachnologist]

Hey, Peter.

How'd your talk with 17th century Frenchman go?

[about an hour later]

[unmasking]

It could've been worse. Waaaaaay worse.

[arachnologist]

So how convinced is he right now that we're all wizards? I mean, that's what you told him, right?

[unmasking]

I considered going the Hogwarts route, but I decided against it. I'd have to sort him, too, and I don't know what house he's in yet.

[arachnologist]

You could always just default to Hufflepuff. It's a pretty safe bet.

[unmasking]

Yeah, but Gryffindor sounds way cooler to most people. And if he's a Ravenclaw, he'll be really insulted.

[arachnologist]

Hey, Hufflepuff had Cedric. There's honor in being a Badger.

[unmasking]

... Wait, you think you're a Hufflepuff, don't you? I totally pinned you as a Ravenclaw.

[arachnologist]

I'm just saying I'd be okay with it. I could totally rock being a Hufflepuff.

[unmasking]

I'm getting the idea that you could probably rock anything.

[arachnologist]

Oh. Uh. That's flattering? Thanks.

You still up for meeting?

[unmasking]

Yeah. The lobby?

[arachnologist]

Yup. I'll be there.