[video]

[alwaysimpure]

[It's Sirius Black, on video, apparently in a good mood. That can't be good.]

I'm interrupting everyone's busy schedule of catching mice and grooming for a very important announcement: It's Harry's birthday tomorrow! Happy Birthday, Harry!




[A wizard with a wand and some fre time on his hands can do a lot of real life sparkles.]

So, I'm not sure how comfortable you are with making this all public, but let's be honest, birthdays are always partly an excuse to publicly embarrass the birthday boy. At least I'm not singing. Yet. I will in a few hours, when it's your actual birthday, I'm just starting early, because you never know what this island will be up to next.

I did however already get you a present and I think I finally managed to work out most of the kinks.

[With that he moves the device to show the gift he made for him.]



I've been working on it for a while now and chances are this one won't break free and evade capture for months on end. Probably. Anyway, I'd like to celebrate. If you don't mind. There's a lot of catching up to do and I have some things to show you.

Everyone else, you should celebrate tomorrow too! It's a great day.

[Private to Sheska and Once-ler]

I need birthday food for a teenage boy and I thought, hey, I know two people very likely to be willing and able to help me out. Against payment of course, Once-ler. Maybe you two could work on it together? [nudge nudge wink wink]

[ooc: Sorry for spamming the comm, but it's HARRY POTTER'S BIRTHDAY, damn it. Also, the image isn't quite right, but you try finding a flying broom that's not a replica of a Harry Potter movie prop.]

Comments

derpler derpius and derpska

[thneed]

That just seems off if you only pay one of us though. We'll have to talk her into taking it. [ because the other way around where nobody takes it doesn't even register as an option ]

You're mature? Really?
He'll need a cake, at least.

I kinda like the sound of that, seems about right. Derpius seems so scientific.

[alwaysimpure]

This will end in you taking the money on her behalf, won't it?

No, I'm not mature. It's called sarcasm, British export product. And yes, cake is definitely needed. A big cake. With lots and lots of chocolate.

it really does

[thneed]

...Yes.

I know what sarcasm is. Just chocolate? What else? What kind of food does he like?

Derpius Blackus

[alwaysimpure]

I...

Er. I have no idea... When I first saw him he was mostly fond of mother's milk and later a lot of different mush.

He's kind of grown since then.

scientific animal breed. the elusive derpius blackus...

[thneed]

Uhhh. Yeah, that would be pretty grown in comparison to that. I think we need to ask him if he even likes chocolate before we go covering a cake in it.

highly endangered by itself

[alwaysimpure]

Huh. Well, I know he liked it when I fed him sweets like chocolates, though his mother disapproved.

known to attract fleas

[thneed]

She would. I don't think that's baby food.
Maybe we should have cake options.

known to attract anything

[alwaysimpure]

Anything that has cake in plural is a great idea if you ask me.

But you and Sheska can figure it out. Together. You two.

performs a mating dance for a variety of species

[thneed]

It really is.

Just us? [ :| ]

The reason for his appeal is a mystery.

[alwaysimpure]

Just you and her.

[Look at that eve more subtle winking.]

Won't that be fun?

[thneed]

[ squints at. you call that subtle? ]

Yeaaaaah.

[alwaysimpure]

[Hey, he could be so much less subtle. Promise.]

Well, you know what you have to do, Once-ler.

[thneed]

Do I?

[alwaysimpure]

You don't?

Together they make the Derpsters Three

[librariansheart]

Oh, he can have it, if he likes! I certainly don't need it. Besides, it's going to be so much fun! Are there any treats from home that we should try and match?

The most derp!

[alwaysimpure]

Probably not, since they are either magical or taste like British people came up with it.

Or both.

the three derpsketeers.

[thneed]

You make it sound like British people coming up with food is a terrible idea.

derpegnan, derpos and derpemis

[alwaysimpure]

Oh, it is. I'm the last of about a hundred generations of Britishness, so I know what I'm talking about.

Though I've come up with some great sweets, I'd say.

all for derp and derp for all

[thneed]

Didn't they originate modern icecream and lasagne?

derp from the rich to give to the derps?

[alwaysimpure]

I don't know, isn't that Italian?

What do I know, you're probably more of a food expert. I eat anything I get.

[thneed]

Italian? Yeah but I think the earliest recipe found is in a cookbook for a British King though.

I am a food expert! You know what's also British? Modern pancakes.

[alwaysimpure]

Didn't know that. Go figure.

Merlin, I love pancakes. You should expertly make some for me right now.

[thneed]

Now you do! Courtesy of invention-origin-slash-food-expert, me.

I thought I was making birthday cakes first.

[alwaysimpure]

You can't make birthday cakes and pancakes at the same time?

[So much disappointment.]

[thneed]

No, I can. How much am I getting paid again?