REGARDING YOUR RECENT LAPSE IN BRAIN ACTIVITY!

[ihateyouetc]

HEY ASSHOLES

AND BY ASSHOLES I MEAN A CHOICE SAMPLE OF DEFECTIVE AND COMPLETE ASSHOLES AMONG THE REST OF YOU ASSHOLES, WHICH MEANS ALL GRAY-SKINNED IDIOTS AND NO HUMANS EXCEPT EGBERT AND HARLEY NEED APPLY
SO WITH THAT IN MIND, I'VE REVIEWED ALL THE MEMOS POSTED SINCE SOLLUX'S DISAPPEARANCE TO PRESENT.
CONSIDER ME "UP TO SPEED" ON WHAT THE FUCK IS UP, SO EVEN IF THIS IS COMING IN TARDY LIKE GAMZEE GOING TO GET SCHOOLFED ON A FINE "WEEKEND DAY" AFTERNOON, I FEEL THE NEED TO REMIND YOU LOSERS OF SOMETHING REALLY IMPORTANT.
LIKE, REALLY IMPORTANT. SO FUCKING IMPORTANT YOU BETTER BE TAKING NOTES. ARE YOU READY????
UH OH! TOO BAD. HERE IT COMES:
CALM THE FUCK DOWN AND STOP STARTING SHIT WITH EACH OTHER.
OHHHHHHHH SHIT!
I JUST USED 8 H'S. THIS IS FUCKING SERIOUS.

A LOT OF FUCKED UP SHIT HAPPENED AND THEN SOLLUX DISAPPEARED. THOSE OF US WITH ANY DEGREE OF PITY FEEL LIKE SHIT ABOUT IT.
I DON'T THINK I NEED TO TELL ANYONE IT'S POINTLESS TO LOOK ANYMORE. HE'S GONE. HE WAS "RELEASED" INTO THE VAST REALM OF WHEREVER THE FUCK. HE'S NOW FROLICKING AMONGST WHO THE FUCK KNOWS LIKE A GRAND HOOFBEAST GALLOPING ACROSS A GENTLE PLAIN, WIND BILLOWING THROUGH HIS MANE LIKE THE BREEZE SOFTLY RUSTLING THROUGH HIS HIVEMATE'S NECKCAPE. WHATEVER ANY OF THAT MEANS.
LOOK, DIDN'T ANYONE ELSE NOTICE ERIDAN WAS ACTUALLY THE FIRST ONE TO NOTICE SOLLUX WAS GONE?
PRETTY FUCKING FAST FOR SOMEBODY WHO DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT, IF YOU ASK ME.
AND WHILE I'M CALLING PEOPLE OUT

/!\ ¡!URGENT!¡ ATTENTION PYROPE AND AMPORA ¡!URGENT!¡ /!\

WHAT THE EPHEMERAL HUMAN CHRIST WAS THAT EVEN.
I TRIED TO COMPREHEND WHY ANY OF THAT NEEDED TO BE A CONVERSATION BUT THEN I GOT DISTRACTED BY THE PULSATING SENSATION OF MY THINKCELLS HAVING SIMULTANEOUS SEIZURES AND COLLAPSING WHILE CONVULSING, LEAKING A MUTANT CHERRY RED EXPLOSION OF PURE, UNADULTERATED "WHAT THE FUCK" FROM THEIR COLLECTIVE GAPING SEEDFLAPS WHICH THEY SUDDENLY ACQUIRED FOR THE PURPOSE OF THIS METAPHOR, LEAVING ME WITH NO RECOLLECTION OF ANYTHING RESEMBLING A CONCLUSION TO MY ORIGINAL QUESTION WHICH I MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE REACHED PRIOR TO IT HAPPENING.
I HAVE NO SHITTY ASSHOLE'S BLUE CLUE.

JOHN, DO ME A FAVOR AND IMAGINE I SAID SOMETHING TO YOU LIKE I ALWAYS SAY SINCE I DON'T FEEL LIKE REPEATING MYSELF YET AGAIN LIKE SOME KIND OF MENTALLY DEFICIENT PERSON OR BROKEN RECORD THAT SOME JERK THINKS IT'S A GREAT IDEA TO KEEP PLAYING EVEN THOUGH IT'S OBVIOUSLY BROKEN.

AND SPEAKING OF THAT
WHAT IS THE SPRITE PROTOTYPED WITH STRIDER DOING HERE???
WHERE THE HELL IS STRIDER
NOT THAT I ACTUALLY GIVE A SHIT BECAUSE WE DON'T NEED TWO OF THOSE GUYS
BUT SERIOUSLY

WHAT.

Comments

[squidissension]

the is the fuckin stupidest thing ivve evver heard you and that maid a blood sludge are gettin wway too uppity in this place

[rocketchair]

dON'T CALL HER THAT,

[squidissension]

try and tell me wwhat to do one more time tavv i fuckin dare you

[rocketchair]

wELL,

[rocketchair]

uHH,

[rocketchair]

pLEASE, dON'T CALL HER THAT,

[squidissension]

yeah wwhatevver

[squidissension]

so

[squidissension]

that fucked up tvv thing told you all that

[rocketchair]

yEAH,
i KNOW HE WAS, uHH, kIND OF MEAN TO YOU,
sO, uHH, i'M SORRY,

[squidissension]

wwhat the fuck do i care about your attempts at gettin a dig in on me alternate shitty self or you cant affect me

[rocketchair]

oH,
wELL, uHH, oK,

[squidissension]

kinda sounds like it had good advvice though

[rocketchair]

yOU, uHH,
yOU REALLY THINK SO,

[squidissension]

yeah howwd you get in there last time again

[rocketchair]

i DON'T KNOW,
uHH, i JUST SORT OF, wOKE UP THERE,
i DON'T EVEN KNOW, uHH, hOW aNYONE FOUND ME,
bUT i WOULDN'T GO BACK, iT WAS, uHH, sCARY,

[squidissension]

useful is wwhat it sounds like

[rocketchair]

bUT, jOHN SAID HE WAS, uHH, mY SHADOW,
hE SAID EVERYONE HAS ONE,
iT'S, uHH, tHE PART OF YOURSELF, tHAT YOU PRETEND ISN'T THERE,
bECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE IT, oR, uHH, iT'S A SECRET,
i THINK THAT'S WHERE EVERYONE ELSE GOES, uHH, wHEN THEY'RE IN THE tV,
aND THAT'S WHY THEY ALL FEEL BAD AFTER,

[squidissension]

feel bad except noww somehoww you havve the backbone to try and tell me off wwhat kinda other shit dyou think a trip in there wwould do for other trolls

[rocketchair]

i'M NOT TRYING TO TELL YOU OFF,
i'M JUST, uHH, tRYING TO MAKE YOU STOP, bULLYING ME,

[rocketchair]

i, uHH, dON'T KNOW WHAT WOULD HAPPEN, tO ANYONE ELSE,
bUT i HOPE THEY DON'T FIND OUT,
oR, uHH, iF THEY DO, i HOPE THEY'RE STILL oK, aFTER,

[yearoftruth.livejournal.com]

I've heard that before.

[squidissension]

yeah wwell isnt it

[yearoftruth.livejournal.com]

It's not up to anyone else, so it wouldn't matter.

[riseup]

no, dude. no.
you don't want that.