[drunk texting]

[brotimaeus]

fcking christmas.
hey you know somethign.
my littleb ro who kinda loosks like me a bit.
lucky fucker.
the first time he tired to use a sowrd it got stusck in th cielgng.
ceilign.
becuas he let go.
i was so fucking proud.

i found him on top of teh tree one year.
pretending to be an angel he said.
bullshit.
he wasfucking stuck up htere.
made the cutest motherufkcing angel you ever did see.

couldnst daveproof shit in that aprtment.
kid got into everuthing.
one time he ttied to eat a live golfdfish because i forgot to feed him.
dont worry the fish was fine.
i thnkk.

haha.
shit.

Comments

[cawmemaybe]

no i had to calculate it by adding all the typos and ill facts youve been spilling out
this is why we dont want you anywhere near the eggnog man

[brotimaeus]

to late.
the eggnotg is gone.

and the rum.
the rum is gone too.

[cawmemaybe]

the rums always gone
how many did you even drink

[brotimaeus]

idk.
twelve.
mabye.
dont sit ther and judge me.
rude.

[cawmemaybe]

im allowed to judge you whenever i want
got my judgmental glasses on and everything

[brotimaeus]

they make you look like a nerd.

[cawmemaybe]

says the guy wearing anime shades

[brotimaeus]

whoa.
whoa.
dont knock the shades bro.

[cawmemaybe]

too late i already knocked it and got it pregnant
gonna have a nest full of chirping little pricks soon
cheep cheep

[brotimaeus]

omg am i gonna be an uncle.
im so fucking proud right now.

[cawmemaybe]

im not letting you name any of my shady chicks

[brotimaeus]

harsh.

[cawmemaybe]

thats what you get for being an ass with a capital a
my babies dont need an uncle who will probably steal their loot way before they can chirp