video; how not to make an entrance

[accidents]

[ and here we have (1) count 'em one tiny tiny viking clutching like his life depended on it and standing in front of the hospital looking more or less in a state of shock.

Just mumbling to himself. Yeah, the turning-it-on part was an obvious accident ]

Wow. This is totally an okay situation.

Hand me a thing and send me off. I'm fine by the way. I'm not freaking out or anything. Thanks for the mental health consideration. Your pep talk was absolutely no help at all but I appreciate your effort which was not really an effort at all. I can contact a network. Odin help whoever thought this one up. What's a network? Gee, I don't know. You know who's fictional? You're fictional. You freaky white-wearing freak. [ something makes a sound and he jumps a little ]

That's it. I've died. It's not even Valhalla because the world is way too hot heat-wise and things are probably on fire. I'm melting. Lucky me. Fire and brimstone for you, Hiccup. It's okay we upgraded the afterlife to have odorless fire and brimstone for maximum comfort while you suffer a hysterical breakdown. Have fun with your metal abominations. We'll miss you in Berk.

I feel so honored to have this experience.

Comments

[accidents]

He. Toothless is like a big ...cuddly..? Can I call a dragon cuddly? No. Uh. Like a big scale-covered reptile that- Hm. He's great. I don't know how to describe him. You'd probably have to meet him. [ :C But he's not here. Oh geez it's sinking in. ] Snowball fights? That's a significantly less harmful way to use a catapult. Sure. I can do that, I guess. ...It's a term of endearment really. Like Wow. You're awful and disgusting! And then a fellow viking would be like 'Thanks. I haven't bathed in weeks.'

[freezespirited]

I'd like to meet him. How many people can say they've met a dragon, besides you. Why Toothless? Really? Thanks! What do you want in return? Snow? Ice? So insults are taken as compliments? Berk must be magical.

[accidents]

One-hundred percent of the population of Berk. His teeth a retractable so he looks like he's toothless unless he pulls them out. You're welcome. Not like I know what else I'm supposed to do here. Might as well build catapults. ...You can give snow and ice? Super magical. What a place.

[freezespirited]

How many people outside of Berk? That's useful. Have you ever flown? I can. I can pay you too. It's not like I have any other use for it. I have some...comic books and movies too, you can borrow those. You have Vikings and dragons, that's something.

[accidents]

None that I know of. I've flown on the dragon? But on my own my success has been zero. You mean you can actually fly? That's ridi-- No. Wait. Who am I to question anything right now? You can fly. Okay. Why can you fly? ....what am I borrowing? The only part I got was 'books.' It's something, alright.

[freezespirited]

Never said I could fly. You mentioned riding inventions. I can fly, by the way. Why? It's just something I can do. Comics and movies. Comics are books, but with a lot of pictures, and movies are...it's like watching a story, but by using several devices.

[accidents]

I thought the 'I can' was part of the flown question but it was the answer to the snow question and I got all mixed up. So. Wait. You're like a flying snow-making guy? [ whaaaat ] ...What kind of devices?

[freezespirited]

No. Yes. Devices similar to the one you're holding. See that part that has the pictures and words? It's like that, some are even that size, but others are bigger.

[accidents]

"No. Yes."? [ oh the video is tilting back and forth and going upside down for a moment. there he goes turning it to look at it from every angle. HOW DO YOU WORK.

he's going to end up taking it apart to look at the insides at some point. ] Huh.

[freezespirited]

I can fly, bring snow days, even blizzards if I want to.

You have no idea how weird that looked.

[accidents]

[ isn't every day a snow day ] Are you a god of winter or something?

Oh. Oops. [ straightens it out ]

[freezespirited]

God... I like that. I'm a Guardian.

You'd probably understand it better than I do once you see it.

[accidents]

Isn't a guardian the same thing?

Probably.

[freezespirited]

It's like its own different thing. Even if a couple of them have the ego of gods.

Well, they're everywhere. Why don't you look around?

[accidents]

I think some having a god-ego comes with any classification of being as a universal constant. How many guardians are there?

[ looks left. looks right. ]

I wouldn't know where to start on that.

[freezespirited]

Five. How many dragons are there?

When in doubt, go left.

[accidents]

A lot.

[ raises an eyebrow at that and gives him a weird look but shrugs, straightens himself out and starts heading left ]

[freezespirited]

Lucky you.

You need to play more video games.

[accidents]

It's a loveable hassle.

I don't even know what those are but I don't think games would fix my directional issues. [ 'press here to cross'? press. ...this does nothing. moving on. ]

[freezespirited]

Which would you say are a bigger hassle? The dragons, or Vikings?

Some games can. Maybe not video games, but it gives you a direction to go in, which is better than staying in the same spot.

[accidents]

They're both pretty bad. I don't know. The vikings. At least you can train the dragons.

I guess you got a point depending on the game.

[freezespirited]

Course I've got a point. Keep heading left. If you get lost, ask someone for help.

[accidents]

If I started out lost, when's the point where I ask for help?