thoughtformed | (no subject)

[ Just act like Julie. You don't have to be a normal person. He takes her hand and carefully pulls himself up before easing himself back into his seat. ]

That was... funny.

[Another chuckle. She takes a pull of her beer, makes a soft 'mm' sound of appreciation, and lets her free hand rest on the bar.]

Well, thank you, but I won't do it again too soon. I might get us kicked out of the bar.

N..nah.. [ The owner is a nice guy. They can't get banned from the bar. At least, he doesn't think they can. Not unless they did something awful like lean across the bar and eat that really tasty looking bartender with the skull that looks like it probably has great brains in there... Mm. Brains.

Ehem.

He keeps moving his own beer back and forth now. Poking it with a finger. Cold beer, cold beer. You are so cold. ]

[Julie parts her lips to speak, but instead she just watches him, retreating slightly into her own thoughts. Yes, she knows he's one of the creatures that have been hunting down and killing regular humans for as long as she can remember. One of the creatures that killed her friends, Nora's brother.. her mom.

She knows that he killed Perry.

Yet.. she can't find it in herself to hate him for that. Perry was already resigned to death and its inevitability and in a way.. she'd already mourned him long before he was killed.

Julie watches R in the way she usually does - intent, wondering just what he is. She's asked that question many times and never got an answer. What is he..?

Maybe he's just R.]

Hey. You gonna show me around when we're done here?

[ He turns his head back to her and gives a single nod in reply. He'll show her whatever she wants. Except maybe the ocean. He's not exactly a swimmer, that should be obvious. He'd probably sink and stay there. ]

[The last time Julie saw the beach it wasn't really a beach. It was the grit-covered brick and tarmac where the ocean had flooded the city and claimed it back. Eight feet had been all it took.

She would definitely like to see the beach.

Julie finishes her beer quickly and stands up with a pleasant buzz in the back of her mind. She'd been making small talk (very small, and mostly from her) but now she's all business.]

What are you showing me first?

[ What is he showing her first? Crap. He should've thought this one out. He stares blankly while his mind racks up what to share with her. What's a highlight?

Pretty nature things.
Actual people shopping things.
That place where you live
THINGS... ]

Hrm... [ A shrug. We're going to wing it, Julie. ]

Tch! [While he stares she waves a hand in front of his face. This has to be difficult for him, but Julie wouldn't be Julie if she wasn't always poking and prodding to see what he could do.]

Pick something. Anything.

[ This is hard. He's not really top notch with the processing ability. He doesn't mind her poking and prodding though. He thinks it makes him pick up the pace maybe. Force himself not to settle into zombie grunts. ANYTHING ANYTHING.... ]

Store. [ Store? Okay store. Shopping it is. Julie has things to pick from that are all fresh and new and working and not dirty. Which store? We haven't thought that far ahead. ]

Store? You wanna take me shopping?

[She looks down at her clothes. Though they're clean they're old and worn and the top has a few small holes in it. Okay, R, that's not such a bad idea.]

Huh. Okay, lead the way.

Yes.

[ Not necessarily clothes shopping but he sees where she's going with that. Holes and whatnot. His are--- ...uh. Ya know. Anyway.

He pushes himself to his feet and stares at the bartender for a second. Wait. He's supposed to pay this guy. Put it on the tab, dude. Does he have a tab? They'll sort that out later. The guy isn't going to bother him about it now. Bye bar. He's walking out after taking a hold of Julie's hand. This way. ]

[Julie's already become used to R grabbing her hand to lead her out of danger, but this is different. Her fingers carefully lace through his and hold on, and his skin is cool but not clammy and.. actually warmer than she remembers.

She does regret leaving him behind, but it had been the best idea - the only idea - at the time. It seems that he forgives her, anyway. She's glad of that.. moreso than she thought she'd be.

While they walk, she rests her head against his shoulder.]

Have you found yourself a girl in all the time you've spent here by yourself?

[Teasing? Maybe a little.]

[ She's so comfortable with him right now. It's nerve-wracking. If he even has all his nerves working to be completely nerve-wracked. He supposes some of them are firing at least.

Nerve-wracking in a completely a-okay this is really really nice kind of way. ]

[ ---Girl? Julie, no. He's looking at his feet now and shrugging the shoulder her head isn't on up. He's got his dead un-beating heart stuck on one. ] No...

[Maybe people will stare at him less if he has a pretty normal-looking girl on his arm. Though, maybe they'll stare more because how the heck did a half-dead guy manage to get a girl at all?]

No? A good-looking guy like you?

[ 'Like you' would imply said good-looking guy was just as dead. That's a no. And good looking guy in general is a no.

He knows good looking guys here, sure. But we're probably not going to go linking arms with them and holding hands anytime soon. Or ever. ]

No. No. [ Julie pls. ]

[The girl laughs and lands a gentle punch on his arm. Who knew zombies could get flustered?]

Relax, R, I'm teasing you. Don't look so worried.

[ He knew that. Worried? Who's worried? Nobody's flustered here. He looks at his arm then ahead of them. ]

Oh.

[As they walk, Julie quiets down, paying more attention to the buildings and people they pass on the way. Distracted, she rubs her thumb over the softer part of R's hand and hums softly in the back of her throat.]

I don't remember ever seeing the world like this. [It's just so.. calm. Normal.] Everything was already falling apart when I was born. [She looks up at him with a faint, distant smile.] You know what my dad gave me for my tenth birthday? A twenty-gauge Mossberg Mini.

[She shakes her head. At the time it had been such a thoughtful gift she'd almost cried, but now, looking at this place...]

Things are really messed up, huh...

[ Julie deserves to see the world like this. He's staring at her, mindlessly leading them. It's etched into his head somewhere where everything is. He doesn't have to pay attention.

A gun for a birthday gift? He would. ]

Mmhm.

[ Can't argue with things being messed up. He eats people. That's pretty messed up to begin with and then you got all the other horrible things piled on top of that. ]

He wasn't always like that.

[She looks down, swinging their clasped hands gently between them.]

When I was younger - a lot younger, before it all really started - he was different. He used to laugh. Mom had videos of him singing and playing guitar. [Julie remembers those times. They're some of the memories she holds onto the most fiercely, because she has no other way of recording them.] After we left home.. I guess the army training just took over.. he wanted to keep us safe. Me and mom.

[ His eyes keep following the swinging hands.
Maybe he died inside.

He'd ever wonder this out loud. That's not even his thought. Blame Perry. Or not blame Perry. Jesus Christ, has that guy been quiet until now. Stop thinking about Perry. New topic.

Julie's dad can play guitar.
He doesn't think he would listen to any of his music. ]

After mom.. after she died, he.. [Though she's still talking it's coming more hesitantly now, stilted and quiet as if she wants to finish the story but doesn't, at the same time.

R's always been so easy to talk to.

He just listens.]

He changed. It was like.. he lost something, you know? Something more than just mom. Like something inside him just gave up.

[ She doesn't have to finish it but she does. Why did people give up like that? He thinks it's stupid and ridiculously hard to do with Julie there. She's worth it.

When you give up as a corpse, you just rot away and then you're gone forever. Give up as a human and you have options and you can do it without dying. It's probably worse than rotting because the corpse wouldn't put anyone in pain.

He tugs her hand very lightly and keeps them swinging. ]

[Julie lifts her head up and smiles bravely, squeezing his fingers in response to his tugging.]

It's funny, though.. Sometimes it feels like you're more alive than he is.

[ The dead guy shouldn't be more alive than the alive guy.

Okay. Let's smile back for Julie. ...No, that probably looks like you're going to eat her. Stop smiling.

Look. Store. ]

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