[Open Log] - The Change is upon us...

[coimiceoir]

Who: Anyone and everyone!
What: Becoming a supernatural creature isn't all fun and games
When: After sundown Oct 27th through Oct 31st
Where: The apartments, the forest, around the city at night... Anywhere you like!
Warnings: Blood, illness, vampirism, lycanthropy, violence, etc, etc...

Everyone has a lot of plans to do a lot of things this plot, and Jackie C, one of our lovely mods, has given permission to set up a gathering place for all the logs people may want to do!

Here's how this works:

1. Post a comment with your character's name as the subject line.
2. (Optional) Maybe a list of CR/scenarios you were planning on?
3. ????
4. PROFIT! Find the people you were going to log with and hop to it, soldier!

This does not invalidate Network posts! If you prefer posts or action spams, don't let this log collection stop you! Go right ahead and do whatever you're most comfortable with. The most important thing is to have fun.

Come on in... if you dare.

Comments

Lin and Koizumi - Icons of self-indulgence

[steelweb]

This was an unbridled nightmare. A disaster on all levels. She could list out everything that went wrong, but that would take weeks. Lin sighed, gritting her teeth against the headache pounding behind her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. She couldn't just write the whole thing off as a bad job, much as she longed to, that wasn't how Beifongs dealt with problems. She wasn't a child, to ignore the consequences and pretend it had never happened.

She had killed... so many people, over the last week. But chief among them, Sarah and Koizumi. And had attempted to kill Coulson. Would have killed Carol. Among others. But those were the ones she needed to address first.

Koizumi convulsing on her bed, that strange mixture of pain and euphoria in his face; the eagerness with which he had brought down another and followed her orders. The taste of his blood, the velvet heat of it flowing over her tongue. Revulsion churned in her stomach and she tasted bile. He knelt before her, bowing his head, the very shadows reacting to his presence. He had been hers, and even now there was a hard, hot, jealous possessiveness that curled under her breastbone just thinking about it.

And then there had been that night. After he had broken her out.

She quickly took a drink of water, trying to counteract the surge of self-hatred that accompanied a smug satisfaction and low pulse of pleasure. No. It was wrong and despicable, and he couldn't be left thinking that she would act on that again.

Setting the empty glass beside the sink, she swung her coat over her shoulders and headed for the door. She'd see Koizumi first. Then she'd see.

[dontmindmepleasecontinue]

Koizumi had woken up to a nightmare. So much had happened in the past week, so many friendships that might now be broken. How would Aqua or Sarah react to how he'd turned them, attacked them - how he'd treated them with such disrespect, as inferior? He'd attacked Rapunzel too, and Jack, and half a dozen nonfictionals. What would Aisling think of the deer he killed, and how he'd lost control during the Dark Hour? And what would Sheska think of what had happened - turning her, then kissing her like that, and generally behaving as if she was his, in more than one sense of the word. He wasn't sure which, if any, of these friendships would ever recover.

However, he was most worried about Lin. Nothing that had happened between them really bothered him, for his own sake - he obviously didn't blame her for any of it. But things were rocky enough between them already, with her guilt over what had happened during the mess with the timelines - he knew what she would think. He couldn't let her believe that of herself, leave her to make things worse in her head than they really were.

He made his way over to her apartment, not even waiting to get breakfast. But when he found himself in front of her door... he hesitated. He sighed, frustrated with himself. Was he afraid of what she thought about what happened? Or was he afraid of his feelings about it? And if the latter, was he afraid that what happened wasn't what he wanted, or that it was? All of these were questions he wasn't sure how to answer.

He glanced out the window, noting that the sun wasn't even peaking over the horizon yet. It was still early. If he were still a vampire, he'd be climbing in his coffin about now. He shook his head - this wasn't something he wanted to wake her with.

He leaned back against the wall outside her door, sliding to the floor and putting his head in his hands. He stayed like that - quiet, unmoving - until without warning the door opened beside him, and he was abruptly looking up at her, caught off guard. "Lin..."

[steelweb]

"Itsuki..." The name slipped out before she could catch herself. One of these days she was going to start expecting him to be there whenever she turned around. The older woman took in his posture, the expression on his face. He'd been waiting for her. She sighed. That polite demeanor was going to get him killed one day. The care he displayed for her already had. She glanced out of the hall window to where the sky was beginning to pale and brighten, swallowing a fresh wave of nausea.

"Come on," she said quietly, and offered him a hand up. Not back inside. Sarah was either sleeping or on her way home, and neither option was conducive to settling high tension. A patr-- a walk would be better.

[dontmindmepleasecontinue]

A plethora of emotions Koizumi dulled but didn't actually try to hide quickly chased each other around his face: worry, regret, happiness, confusion - and then his face flushed in a way he seemed very unused to, and he wasn't quite able to meet her eyes. Discomfited, he just looked at Lin's hand for a moment or two before recognizing it for what it was and accepting it, standing softly. He slid his hands in his pockets and nodded, quietly taking a place walking beside her.

He took a deep breath. After a moment, he began hesitantly. "Lin, what happened this past week..." He faltered, his own emotions confused and jumbled enough he wasn't quite sure how to continue.

[steelweb]

Hm. He really was off his game. Obscurely, that made her feel better about the whole situation. If he hadn't been bothered by everything that had happened, she would have gotten him analyzed, because that simply wasn't natural. As it was... If he preferred to keep an eye on the streets around them instead of looking at her, she didn't fear for his mental health. Still, her jaw clenched briefly when he spoke. But hadn't this been what she'd ventured out to talk about in the first place?

She glanced at him, only just remembering to not shut down, letting her guilt and unease and confusion be seen. "I'm sorry." Her hand clenched at her side, reflecting the tightness of her throat that roughened her voice and kept the pitch so low. "None of that should have happened."

[dontmindmepleasecontinue]

He focused on breathing and keeping calm, trying to ignore the heat in his cheeks and the rushing noise in his ears. For all his experience dealing with people, he was utterly unprepared for this.

He turned to her, almost panicked when she apologized, eyes widening - this was exactly the thing he wanted to avoid. "No, I...!" Breathe, Koizumi. He clenched his hands, and began again, more calmly. "It's not your fault. It was instinct driving you to turn me; I did the same, several times - most without any prompting. That was the island, not something we could control.

As for the other..." His face reddened again, and he glanced away. "That wasn't - I mean, I was aware of what was going on. You didn't force anything on me, nor did my own instincts. Nothing forced me to say yes." And he thought he couldn't blush any further. Clearly he had been wrong. His words were quiet, hesitant. "That was my own doing."

It was a delicate line he drew there. He said that nothing forced him to say yes, and that was true - but he did not say that nothing could have forced him to say yes. However, it doesn't even occur to him to try to excuse the nature of their relationship as spawn and sire.

[steelweb]

Lin blinked, eyebrows climbing as she took in just how much this was bothering him. All right then. All those times he provoked her into ranting and raving, not to mention hurting him more times than she'd like to count, and now he needed her to be the rational one. She let him find the end of his words, listening, turning them over, examining them. It was clear that one of these things was more important than the other. And privately she agreed, though perhaps it was telling that both of them were more concerned with the... impropriety than the killing. Perhaps the lesser problem should be dealt with first, if he'd let her concentrate on it for a moment.

Considering the subject soberly, she cast her gaze ahead again, letting a moment of silence elapse before speaking. "You turned two, didn't you. Two and a half, if we count Sarah as a shared burden." Her hands clamped down on Sarah's shoulders, holding her in place while Koizumi fed, sinking her own fangs into the base of the girl's throat. Letting the thick red blood flow from her own veins into Sarah's mouth... Her jaw worked around the next words, feeling them out before slowly letting them escape. "You remember it. When I turned you. When you turned them. You're going to talk to them later, I assume. To do what?"

[dontmindmepleasecontinue]

His expression darkened. "Yes. I remember. Like something out of a dream, perhaps, but real enough." His expression cleared a little, and grew more focused. He spoke slowly, choosing his words carefully. "I am going to talk to them, yes. Mostly? To make sure they're okay. After that, to see where things stand between us, and if there's anything I can do to repair the damage the island has done to our friendships." He glanced over at her, a small, wry smile playing at his lips. "And then, yes, to apologize - but not because I feel guilty or because I am at fault. I will apologize because my friendship to them is more important than proclaiming my innocence - and if I can help to mend things by accepting responsibility for events, it will be a small price to pay."

There was a considered pause. "However, I understand what happened. I understand that it wasn't your fault. And I have no need to blame anyone for what happened. You have nothing to apologize for." He stopped, then, still a little anxious - but he'd addressed what he could of the first issue. He still had to wait for her to respond to the second.

[steelweb]

Lin sighed, reflecting wearily that she should have expected that. "Whether you need to blame someone or not, you deserve to have an apology for having everything you could have done in the week derailed. Even if, as you say, I was merely the carrier for things beyond our control, you deserve for someone to recognize the trouble and strain you were put through. So for once just accept it."

[dontmindmepleasecontinue]

He smiles gently. "I have no problem accepting your apology. I do, and I appreciate that you were willing to give it.

However, though I may accept your apology, I do not accept that you should feel guilty over what happened." There was a considered and pointed pause. "You will anyway, of course. We both know that. And that's fine. As long as you know that that is a reflex, and that despite what it may tell you, you are not at fault." This part of the conversation was familiar, almost comfortable - they'd had it before, and worse.

However, he knew he was not prepared for the conversation they would have next - it was completely unfamiliar territory, both for him in general and especially for them in specific. They'd pretty much always known there was an attraction between them, ever since the memory event around Christmas last year. However, that is one conversation they have never spoken - and now, both against their will but also not, it had been taken to the next level.

[steelweb]

Lin resists rolling her eyes. Dealing with Koizumi is nearly the polar opposite of dealing with Korra. Korra takes everything too personally, and almost always reacts with violence. Koizumi, on the other hand, seemingly never takes anything personally and favors the least confrontational path possible. Neither option is precisely healthy, but Lin is ill-equipped, apparently, to be convincing either of them that. Tenzin probably has some sort of sage, round-about, airbender-style thought problem that would show them their errors, but that sort of spiritual foolery is definitely not Lin's style. Not that hers is helpful in these situations. Besides, they've been over this before, and he's as stubborn as any earthbender. Still, she has to tamp down a rising irritation. Snapping and trying to get the last word in isn't going to help. They have more important things to discuss.

The subject of blame there is even more complex. Her feelings on the matter are... confused. He had cut off her apology on the topic already, making it even harder to give. "The... other night. Whether or not that was entirely your feelings being given free rein, or a compulsion, that can't happen again, Koizumi."

[dontmindmepleasecontinue]

He feels out her words, considering and responding to them with deliberate slowness. He can't afford to make a mistake here, and he really doesn't know what he is doing. "As I said, while I was not completely myself, it was not any sort of instinct or compulsion that drove me."

There is a long pause before he spoke again. There are a lot of emotions roiling under the surface, and he examins them all before composing his answer. The hint of a blush remains on his cheeks, but he keeps himself mostly in control. "...I can't promise that. Or rather, I won't.

We've never discussed the exact nature of our relationship before, or what it could be. I've refrained from doing so, out of respect for your wishes. It's complicated, I know, moreso because of your history and our ages.

I'm not saying that it will happen again, or even that it should. But that's a promise I can't take back, ever - and so that's a promise I'm not willing to give. Not now. Especially not without even knowing what we are to each other. Talking it through.

Of course - barring the island messing with us, which neither of us can do anything about - it will never happen again without both of our full knowledge, understanding, and consent. That I can promise. So if you remain resolute that it should not happen, it won't."

[steelweb]

What had she just been thinking about his stubbornness? Lin grits her teeth, biting back an acidic remark until he'd finished. Being a vampire had changed her. Had changed him. Neither of them would ever do something to hurt a friend, and yet each of them had killed. Their thought processes had been altered by death. Effectively drugged. Informed consent under such circumstances was impossible. She may be resigned to not bearing the fault of several deaths on her conscience, furious as she is, but that doesn't mean that what she had done was right. Or legal. It could be considered rape, given how eager he had been to do anything for her in that altered state. What they feel for each other now isn't precisely relevant except in how they chose to handle it.

"I'm not asking you to promise." Somehow she keeps her voice even, despite the desire to snap. "I'm telling you what is going to happen on my end. Whether you promise or not, I am not going to condone or perpetuate that behavior."

[dontmindmepleasecontinue]

He nods, as if she had just agreed with him, and turns his gaze forward again. "Then we understand one another." He continues walking, looking much more calm and controlled. Lin has told him her intentions, and he has effectively conveyed his position. Of course, she didn't acknowledge it now to do more than reject it, but he is confident it will stick with her, and that she will examine it at greater length later - once she is alone. That's the most he can hope for, for now.

It isn't that he wants to sleep with her again, though he does hold some level of attraction to her. She has always been so adamant not to talk about it, to pretend it doesn't exist, that he has for the most part held off from examining their relationship - even just for himself.

Defining a relationship without being allowed to examine it is something he refuses to do. If she wanted to take the time to figure out what exactly they were to each other, he would be only happy to oblige - but until such a point, he could make no judgments of promises about it. Honestly, there was no reason for blanket statements about the future anyway - he trusted himself, and his judgment. Who was he to deny his future self an option, when his future self had more knowledge and more experience to go off of?

He's quiet for a moment, seemingly taking the time to appreciate the sunrise and the morning air. "So how are you holding up, Lin? About everything?"

[steelweb]

She bristles slightly, needled by the question in a way that she shouldn't be. He always asks, even though he knows she'd rather work it out herself. But doesn't she always ask him the same question? Taking a deep breath, she releases it slowly through her nose, forcing herself to stand down.

"I'm fine," she says shortly, then grimaces and corrects herself. "Coping. There's going to be a lot of ground to cover today, and I'm not looking forward to it. People may not be held responsible for the crimes they committed in that state, but there's still a lot of damage control. Even if I'm not exactly a part of the official clean up."

She automatically hesitates as the golden morning light spills down the building beside them, but takes a deliberate step into it and lifts her face into the warmth. If only everything about this ordeal was so easy to erase. "The trust is going to take a while to rebuild. It always does." Somehow it's clear that she's not just speaking about outside relationships.