A DISTRESS PARROT

[reanimated]

WHERE THE FUCK AM I AND WHY ARE THERE GHOSTS EVERYWHERE?

Comments

[subspaceflowers]

I believe that usually calls for a witch burning.

[notvictorious]

ha She called you a witch

[subspaceflowers]

You did say that he sees spirits, yes?

[notvictorious]

mierda No this isnt a Lunar Fever thing. Were fine, he's fine, we're all fine here

Howre you?

[subspaceflowers]

Poor sick dear. I am certain that there is a physician who can help quell your fever.

I fare well, however. Yourself?

[notvictorious]

No fever, I sit at a comfortable 98.6 degree human temperature for humans

[subspaceflowers]

What an oddly specific answer. Curious, one would think.

[notvictorious]

not really

I have a good thermometer

[subspaceflowers]

You speak in strange words. It would seem to me that any person speaking in strange terms must be speaking the tongue of the Devil himself. Perhaps you should be put to the stake as well.

[notvictorious]

The devil? Okay, you wanna have a Christ off, pretty sure I can out rosary you on a bad day. So no, I'm not gonna be put to the stake. Nathan ether even though he'd probably make it out okay.

[subspaceflowers]

You claim that you are of the Faithful, and yet you still speak strangely. Not the Devil, I think, but more sick than I thought. I think perhaps you really ought to see a physician.

[notvictorious]

I think I'll get over it

[reanimated]

Oh thank god, are you doing the sexy pirate wench routine again?

[subspaceflowers]

I beg your pardon? You accuse me of Piracy?

[reanimated]

Yyyyyyyyyes?

[subspaceflowers]

Such a foul accusation you make on my honour, sir. Even if I were to make such an admission, how can I be certain that you are to be trusted with such information? Surely a handsome, and generous man such as yourself wouldn't dare let a lady hang for such heinous crimes?

[reanimated]

Considering I'm currently locked away in some cross between purgatory and the gulag, you can trust any potential sexy pirate secrets are safe with me!

[subspaceflowers]

Are you being held captive somewhere? It may be better to have these types of discussions in person. Face-to-face, as it were.

[reanimated]

Ohhhhh trust me, the second I know exactly where the fuck I'm being held captive you'll be the first to know.

[reanimated]

I'd say follow the trail of ghosts but that's probably not helpful. Also I don't want to be hanged, although it WOULD be a new way to die...

[subspaceflowers]

Well, what can you see? Surely you must be at least somewhat aware of your surroundings. Can you tell whether you are at sea? Or are you imprisoned?

[reanimated]

Oh yeah I can see loads, let me just go ahead and describe it to you! DARK, GHOSTS, VICTOR KEEPS VOMITING seriously man stop. It's disgusting. Fuck me, why don't parrots come installed with GPS

[subspaceflowers]

Well that does help a little. Maybe you've been stowed somewhere. Can you move much? Are you bound? I know that you must be more clever than that.

[reanimated]

See but outside of Robocop for nefarious reasons or you for sexy reasons, I can't think of anyone who'd want to stow me away on a ship.

[subspaceflowers]

Did you not insist that you see the spirits of the dead? Perhaps your gift has not gone unnoticed.