(no subject)

[ricinbeans]

Are you shitting me?





Guys, I shouldn't have to say this, but don't. Just... don't.

Comments

[arachnologist]

Wow. Once again: this isn't weird and sort of suspicious at all.

[ricinbeans]

Oh yeah? You think? Nahhhh, what normal, respectable business WOULDN'T pull crap like this?

[arachnologist]

If this keeps up, I might actually start believing he's legitimate. Paperwork and everything. God, Peter is rubbing off on me.

I think the real question is what high schooler is going to really want "fine home goods" in the first place? Last I checked there wasn't an after school club for interior decorating.

[ricinbeans]

He thinks he can make kids go apeshit for antiques, I guess. Businessmen, you know? They'll sell water to a fish.

[arachnologist]

At least if it was water we wouldn't be having problems.

But it's good. That you're doing this. Pointing this stuff out, I mean. Is soliciting even legal on school grounds? Maybe I could bring a handful to the principal.

[ricinbeans]

No, it's the least I could do. Literally. I could be doin' way more. It's cool, I think I'm gonna go in there myself. He's a nice guy, right? He'll listen.

i couldn't resist

[riseup]

there is a lot more than home goods, actually.
one time i found my salamander daughter there!!!

[everythingspandex]

Does everyone here have some sort of reptile child? I'm getting concerned.

[riseup]

shrug.
rose and i did it before it was cool.

[everythingspandex]

I mean-- salamanders are amphibians but you're still close to the category for this to be something people should notice.

Why do you have a salamander daughter?

[riseup]

there was a dirty bunny and a small salamander child, it seemed like the right thing to do at the time.

[everythingspandex]

Like a real bunny? Did you adopt the dirty bunny too?

[riseup]

no, just a bunnykind bunny.
you ask a lot of questions.

[everythingspandex]

I have. Science brain. It requires constant questioning of the universe.
What is a bunnykind bunny?

[arachnologist]

I want to know what other reptile children you've heard about.

[everythingspandex]

I'm like eighty percent positive someone has a raptor daughter.

[badtaste]

I don't know if it's his daughter but there's definitely a dude at school with a raptor.

[everythingspandex]

He brings it to school?

[everythingspandex]

I read that wrong. The guy at school is the one that is in possession of the raptor. Yeah.

[symbioteclone]

Wait WHO has a raptor? Peter, keep that kid the hell away from Miles.

[everythingspandex]

Wouldn't he want to be friends with the raptor kid? I mean, you don't want to be not-friends with the kid that's got a dinosaur at his disposal.

[symbioteclone]

It's too dangerous! That kid is probably like three weeks of bullying away from becoming a mass murderer. You know how this super villain stuff goes.

[arachnologist]

... okay, just. That's not a euphemism for something else, right? Please tell me it's not. Though if you're being literal, it might actually be weirder? Um. What's. Salamander daughter?

[riseup]

she's a salamander and also my daughter, that's really all there is to say on the matter.
the point is that there's all kinds of cool stuff at the antique shop, including long lost loved ones that you thought you would never see again.

[roseate]

Jaspers showed up there too.