DID I FORGET SOMEONE???? NOPE. NO POSSIBLE WAY I FORGOT ANYONE.

[ihateyouetc]

I DON'T BELIEVE I EVEN HAVE TO MAKE THIS MEMO.
I FEEL LIKE THAT WITH A LOT OF MEMOS
BUT THIS ONE REALLY SEEMS LIKE IT SHOULD BE "COMMON SENSE."
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU?
OK, GIVEN ALL THAT'S HAPPENED AND ALL THE PEOPLE WHO JUST FUCKING DISAPPEARED
IT'S LIKE PULLING DENTITION GETTING YOU RANCID ASSHOLES TO UNDERSTAND
I THOUGHT IT OVER IN-DEPTH
I MADE MYSELF A WHOLE LIST OF PROS AND CONS.
THE LIST HAD MORE PROS THAN CONS
IN FACT, IT HAD ZERO FUCKING CONS.
THAT'S SO FUCKING FEW CONS THAT IT'S ALMOST CRIMINAL THAT NOBODY PAYS ATTENTION.
I COULDN'T ASK MYSELF HOW I FELT ABOUT IT SINCE I CAN'T CONTACT MYSELF HERE
SO I DIDN'T ACTUALLY GET TO DISCUSS IT WITH ANYONE BUT I FEEL LIKE FUTURE OR PAST ME WOULD AGREE WITH ME HERE:
HOW FUCKING HARD IS IT FOR YOU FUCK-UPS TO LET ME KNOW YOU'RE STILL ALIVE.
SERIOUSLY
TAVROS, WHERE IN THE FUCK ARE YOU???
I'VE BEEN SENDING MESSAGES FOR DAYS.
ARE YOUR LEGS BROKEN AGAIN??????
DID YOU DIE AGAIN???????
I'M NOT GOING TO STOP TEXTING YOU
JUST SMASH A LOT OF GIBBERISH OR SOMETHING AND I'LL TAKE THAT AS A NO.
NO, YOU DIDN'T IN FACT DIE.
BUT DO IT TWICE JUST SO I CAN BE SURE THAT YOU DIDN'T JUST FALL ON THE GROUND REALLY HARD AND YOUR PHONE SENT A STRING OF GIBBERISH.
I DON'T THINK A PHONE COULD SEND TWO STRINGS OF GIBBERISH IF YOU FELL OFF A CLIFF???
I'M NOT SURE, SO YOU SHOULD PROBABLY SEND ME THREE FOR GOOD MEASURE.
ANYWAY, I'M GETTING OFF TRACK.
SOLLUX, FUCK YOU.
IT'S NOT LIKE I'M FUCKING ASKING YOU FOR FAVORS OR ANYTHING.
I'M JUST ASKING YOU TO LET ME KNOW YOU'RE NOT GOING TO FAKE ME THE FUCK OUT AGAIN
EXPLODING LIKE A PACKET OF HUMAN MUSTARD ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE
SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE SUCH A JOUNCING JACKASS ABOUT IT
FEFERI, JUST SEND ME AN ASCII FISH OR SOMETHING FROM TIME TO TIME, OK???
KANAYA, DAMMIT
I'M GOING TO HAVE A FUCKING FIT
JUST TEXT ME SOMETHING THAT ISN'T ABOUT FROGS
EVERY FUCKING TIME WE STILL TALK ABOUT FROGS
I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE WHY WE'RE STILL HAVING THESE CONVERSATIONS ABOUT FROGS
I'M SO FUCKING DONE.
JOHN, SURPRISINGLY, YOU TAKE THE LEAD AT NOT COMPLETELY FUCKING FAILING AT LETTING ME KNOW YOU'RE ALIVE!
CONSIDERING YOUR INCLINATION TOWARD GETTING YOURSELF MURDERED GRUESOMELY, THIS IS A HUGE FUCKING FEAT.
GO ASK FOR A GOLD STAR!
WHEN ASKED WHY YOU DESERVE IT, REPLY "I WAS ABLE TO SUCCESSFULLY COMPLETE THE ACT OF INHALING OXYGEN AND EXHALING WITHOUT CHOKING ON THE STUPID WORDS I SAY."
JADE, YOU ARE A FUCKING HUMAN SPACE DOG.
HOW HARD IS IT????????????????
STRIDER AND FEATHERY ASSHOLE STRIDER, YOU'RE NOT EXEMPT FROM THIS.
I'M NOT FUCKING KIDDING. LET ME KNOW ONCE IN A WHILE, OK??????????????
LALONDE, DON'T TALK TO ME RIGHT NOW.
MAYBE IN A COUPLE WEEKS OR SOMETHING
BUT UNTIL THEN I'LL TRUST YOU'RE PERFECTLY FINE.
OH YEAH, AND SOUJI, YOU TOO.
ALL OF YOU FUCKERS.
IS THIS REALLY SO MUCH TO ASK?????????

Comments

[fuckincakewake]

just kidding
its a wakign nightmare
everyone is dead
i drink to forget the horrific weight destiny has placed on my shuolders and retreat deepre into the horrorof the void
while strider makes do w selfsabotage under the elusive guise of friendly manipulation of time and space
to try and undo the fabrsic that leads to both our creation and humanitys destruction

[riseup]

shit!

[riseup]

i'm sorry.

[fuckincakewake]

pfft
u actuslly bought that??

[riseup]

yes...?

[fuckincakewake]

omg adorable

[riseup]

you were joking?

[fuckincakewake]

duh
i drsink booze cause its delicious

[riseup]

i liked it better when you were joking about having babies with karkat.

[fuckincakewake]

i already have a baby
that baby is my mom

[riseup]

yeah, she is having lots of fun with that.

[riseup]

hey, maybe you could try not texting her a bunch in the middle of the night?
she needs her seer sleep.

[fuckincakewake]

um
how do u even know that

[riseup]

rose is kinda my best friend.
one of three!
four if you count the other dave, which i do.
anyway, best friends do this crazy thing where they talk.
it didn't sound like it was a heavily guarded secret.

[fuckincakewake]

were u THERE in her room in the middsle of the night

[riseup]

nope!
definitely not.

[fuckincakewake]

lame
she reallsy is like her dad then i guess

[riseup]

rose has a dad?
how is she like him?

[fuckincakewake]

dirk
duh

[riseup]

uh.
well there goes karkat's shitty shipping grid, i guess.

[ihateyouetc]

OH GOD
JUST STOP TALKING.

[riseup]

i was just trying to help!

[ihateyouetc]

LET THE GRID REST IN PEACE, JOHN.
THE GRID HAS BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH.
THE GRID DID JACK SHIT TO YOU.
THE GRID WOULD HAVE PROVIDED YOU ALL THE ANSWERS TO YOUR OVERLY SIMPLISTIC PROBLEMS IF WE WEREN'T ALL TRAPPED HERE FOR OVER A DAMN YEAR
AND APPARENTLY OUR RACES AREN'T COMPLETELY EXTINCT ANYWAY I GUESS????
WHAT THE FUCK.

[riseup]

this is all so screwed up.

[ihateyouetc]

YEAH.
WHATEVER. AT LEAST NOIR DIDN'T COME WITH THEM.