;;one | text

[kantstoppfantstopp]

You know what? I don’t care what they say. I know for a fact I’m a real person. I have to be; how can someone as fucking awesome as me not be? It defies all logical explanation. I bet all the scientists would be just as outraged. Even the Chancellor would be.
Because I’m real. I always was.
I’m Prussia.
I’m the reason Germany even exists today.
Hell, I have apothecaries and shopping malls named after me.
That’s how great I am.
I’m calling this entire island out on its shit because this is all complete Scheiß.

Comments

[kantstoppfantstopp]

I've learnt a thing or two about escape. I'll find a way.

_{[No he won't, but he's stuck on this hope.]}

[rule_britannia]

Really.

[His voice couldn't get any flatter.]

Do you think that if there was any way to get out of here, I wouldn't have found it by now? That the people here far more powerful than me wouldn't have found it by now? We're not getting out, Prussia. Not of our own volition.

[kantstoppfantstopp]

_{[Let this sink in for him. It takes a few moments for him the process the fact that there isn't a way to get back home. The only upside to this was knowing that his brother could get by without him. It could be worse. Imagine if he came here from the 1870s.]}

Ah.

What've you been doing to pass the time here?

[rule_britannia]

Teaching, if you'd believe it.

[He seems amused by that.]

Just to pass the time. It keeps me busy enough.

[kantstoppfantstopp]

Teaching? _{[As if hearing Arthur say it wasn't enough.]} Are you serious?

That sounds boring.

[rule_britannia]

Quite serious. It's not as boring as you'd think. Some of my students are very.. unusual.

[kantstoppfantstopp]

So it's actually worth your time?

_{[Iiiinteresting.]} And you have fun? What do you get out of it?

[rule_britannia]

I believe it to be worth my time. What anyone else thinks doesn't really concern me in that regard.

It's work, it keeps me occupied. Certainly far more fun than sitting idle.

[kantstoppfantstopp]

Interesting. What do you teach? Naval strategy?

That seems like a reasonable way to spend your time, assuming you get paid. This place probably operates on currency anyway.

[rule_britannia]

English literature, actually. What use are these kids going to have for naval strategy?

[kantstoppfantstopp]

I don't know, conquering the seas? That'd be a fucking awesome class. Seriously, is no one teaching them any sort of military strategy? _{[He is scandalised.]}

Shakespeare and Chaucer, huh?

[rule_britannia]

Not that I'm aware of, but if I'm entirely honest, a lot of them wouldn't have the aptitude for it.

But, yes, that's right. The students seem to have taken to me quite well; it's strange that I never thought to do this before.

[kantstoppfantstopp]

That's really disappointing. They need to be schooled in things that matter.

Nah, it doesn't surprise me really. You've never been as awesome as me. It's impossible for anyone to be as great as Prussia except for Prussia! But you're not that bad at all. _{[There's a compliment in there somewhere.]} 'Sides, you're sorta good with kids too.

[rule_britannia]

They are being schooled in things that matter. They're not soldiers, Gil, they're children.

[It's a good thing he knows you well enough to see the compliment there.]

Thank you. I'll be taking that last comment with a grain of salt, though.

[Arthur? Good with kids? Are you mental?]

[kantstoppfantstopp]

Then they should at least learn about it so they can see how lucky they are to not have to sacrifice their adolescence for war.

_{[They just need to learn things that he knows a lot about. Besides, some of those past wars are good memories. Like that one time, when he took Silesia from Austria? Fuck yes. It was so badass. He was so awesome...]}

Only one? It's worth at least three grains.

_{[Maybe a little.]}

[rule_britannia]

Why don't you teach it, then?

[As soon as he says that he's wondering if he just made a huge mistake.]

[kantstoppfantstopp]

_{[Oh, the mistake you've just made is huge.]}

Maybe I will! I'll be the best teacher!

[rule_britannia]

... Oh dear god.

[kantstoppfantstopp]

Those kids are gonna get schooled.