[ video ]

[therecipe]

[ she taps the screen once points it around her, showing the street she's on before aiming it back at herself ]

Where am I?

Like really am? Really-really? I got the entire you're-fictional bit but I'm going to keep my skeptical mindset about that one for a while and skip questioning that and go right to what planet are we on? Where on what planet? You can't be too sure these days. And the year? -Is The Doctor here?

Does anyone know?

Comments

[video] nonsense nothing's too late for me

[therecipe]

It sounds rightfully bonkers. Does anyone ever believe it?

Can you tell me anything those spoon-feeders weren't telling me that actually is true about this place? Like what everyone does here? And I'm Clara Oswald. Nice to meet you.

[video] <3

[rule_britannia]

What everyone does here is possibly the only true thing they told you, but given the fact that what some people do here is a cover for other things they might be doing I wouldn't put too much faith in that, either.

[So call him a cynic. Most people do.]

It's a pleasure, I'm sure. I'm Arthur Kirkland.

[video]

[therecipe]

That's very reassuring, Arthur.

[ As in, not in the slightest. All well. That's how this goes, isn't it? He's probably not wrong. ]

[video]

[rule_britannia]

Yet you haven't gone pale or put the phone down in terror. This place could use more people like you.

[video]

[therecipe]

You're not that terrifying. I don't know if it needs more of me.

[video]

[rule_britannia]

Good sense is in short supply. If you tell me you're secretly a megalomaniac bent on taking over the world I shall be rather disappointed.

[video]

[therecipe]

I haven't started investing in world domination schemes just yet.

[video]

[rule_britannia]

Ah, well. When you do, I must request that you let me know. I have previous experience.

[ENGLAND MAKING A JOKE AT HIS OWN EXPENSE. Stop the presses.]

[video]

[therecipe]

Oh? I'll be sure to. Maybe we can team up.

[ proud of u ]

[video]

[rule_britannia]

Of course. The idea of two heads being better than one works just as well when it comes to global conquest.

[video]

[therecipe]

Right. Just makes things easier. It's difficult to take over a planet by yourself.

[video]

[rule_britannia]

You don't know how difficult it is to find people who appreciate that.

[video]

[therecipe]

Bad experiences with that, huh?

[video]

[rule_britannia]

Oh, I don't know if I'd call them bad as such... but history has this terrible habit of recording things differently to how they really were.

[video]

[therecipe]

'Cause records would be the opinion of those who were writing it at the time, yeah?

[video]

[rule_britannia]

You know what they say about history being written by the victors, Ms. Oswald. It has more than a small ring of truth.