[Audio]

[sincenewyork]

[The first sound is of someone clearing his throat -- and it comes from every smartphone on the island as they all switch on.]

Mass broadcast function, okay, here goes. Good phone design, by the way, very intuitive. Especially the overrides.

[The volume scales up for a moment, until it echoes off building faces.]

If I could have everybody's attention for just a minute -

[Volume back to normal.]

Why is there a big building in the middle of town with my name on it? Usually I sign papers for those. Maybe draw up plans... the point is, I should have heard about it, and I didn't. Where am I now, Hong Kong? This looks like Lantau Island. Lantau Island? Everybody from Lantau Island, hands in the air.

Okay, now put your hands down and let me know where I am. I can't see you, I'm broadcasting.

Comments

[hammerhappy]

But an unnecessary one.

[badnewsboy]

What if you need something from the box of ice?

[hammerhappy]

If I am in need of the sugary frozen milk, I will acquire it myself.

[badnewsboy]

What if I wish for something and some unfortunate circumstance doesn't allow me to move?

[hammerhappy]

You may speak. With your voice. Let us not discuss this further, Loki.

[badnewsboy]

Okay. :(

[hammerhappy]

That punctuated face of sadness gives no excuse for not walking across a room. We are capable of it, even if we are oft accustomed to the aid of servants.

[badnewsboy]

:'( This one cries.

[hammerhappy]

There is no use for one that cries, is there?

[badnewsboy]

The one that cries needs more frozen cream.

[hammerhappy]

Perhaps, but will it truly help? I say, give him mead, and then he will no longer cry.

[badnewsboy]

Aye! The textual emotional representation needs mead! And frozen cream.

[hammerhappy]

Can you mix mead and frozen cream into one delicious lifter of mood?

[badnewsboy]

[badnewsboy]

Yes.

[hammerhappy]

Then we should find a way to explore its taste, in the event that someone is truly crying.

[badnewsboy]

Perhaps with a bit of change in perspective, we can produce much cheer. This is a time for celebration!

[hammerhappy]

Aye, though there are many that worry, Loki.

[badnewsboy]

It will suit them as well. Perhaps a bit of hearty cheer is what everyone needs.