[video]

[worldwarnick]

[video starts to the sight of nick miller from the streets of chicago, and a bottle of beer in his hand. have fun]

So wait, wait, are you telling me that everything, EVERYTHING in my life UP TO NOW has been fake? Everything???

Oh, so someone decided it would be SO MUCH FUN for me to just go through law school and then just DROP OFF, LIKE THAT, and waste HALF MY LIFE? Or that it would be GREAT for me to just make terrible life decisions and STILL HAVE THREE ROOMMATES WHEN I'M THIRTY? AND THEN JUST RANDOMLY DECIDE TO TELL ME 'OH, BY THE WAY, THIS IS JUST SOME WEIRD JOKE ON YOU, YOU'RE NOT REAL'.

THIS ISN'T FREAKING COOL, MAN!! IT'S THE OPPOSITE OF THAT!

[drinks the rest of his beer and reaches for another one. is that advisable? who knows]

You know what, no, it is cool, it's the freaking coolest. That means that my failure of a life is not my fault! It's just some godly dude with some twisted sense of humor making fun of me. THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES, JACKASS!

[drinks some more and... suddenly looks surprised]

Wait, if everybody from EVERYTHING is here, what does that mean for Z for Zombie? Are there zombies here? Wait, IS THERE A ZOMBIE IN THIS HOTEL? Did I also mess with some poor dude's life? AM I A GOD?

Comments

[oftpartitioned]

wow. Spaz, much?

[worldwarnick]

Wouldn't you be if someone told you YOU'RE NOT REAL all of the sudden?

[oftpartitioned]

no, cuz I'd tell them to shut up because I'm totally real, duh.

[oscen]

Do you scream at every problem you have, or is this an exception?

[worldwarnick]

I don't yell at EVERYTHING... just at 20% of things.

...OK, 50%.

...ALRIGHT, MORE LIKE 80%

[oscen]

Yeah, I can see that.

Yelling and -- drinking? Really productive. It's like you're single-handedly filling the existential crisis quota for the rest of us.

[groans]

...

[ What even. ]

[worldwarnick]

HOLY SHIT A ZOMBIE!

[groans]

[ Okay, calm down. There's no need to yell. He almost got used to the lack of screaming and fear. It was nice. And it's not like he's standing next to you about to put his teeth into your neck.

Oh. Don't think about food. Now he's hungry. ]

Uh-huh...

[petuniad]

Are you a god?

[worldwarnick]

Maybe I am! Maybe we all are!!

[unmasking]

Ego much?

I mean, I could say something else clever and witty here, but do you really think you're a god because you wrote some World War Z knockoff?

[worldwarnick]

Hey! It's not a World War Z knockoff at all, alright?

Besides, if you could say something clever here you would have so [raspberry noise]

[unmasking]

[Wow, that would be irritating if you weren't clearly a grown man doing that.]


Soooo what is it about?

Video

[nicevampireguy]

Vampires too. I don't bite.

Video

[worldwarnick]

...You're not the dude from Twilight, are you? Because I might have some legal issues we might need to discuss.

Video

[nicevampireguy]

Fuck no. I'm Conrad.

[badnewsboy]

Aye, you seem to be a god. Congratulations! Now try not to smite everyone.

[worldwarnick]

Wow, I can do that?

[badnewsboy]

I would save it for the Fire-Giants.

1/3

[brakesforbirds]

You just moved into a new neighborhood! Why are you already yelling at people!!

actually, done, i lied

[brakesforbirds]

This is why none of our neighbors drop by when I leave notes in the elevator saying I've baked too many cookies again.


Well, that, and I think that thing about Nicole across the hall's trench coat has gotten around.

1/????

[worldwarnick]

BECAUSE I AM DRINKING AND THEY JUST TOLD ME MY WHOLE LIFE IS A LIE, JESS!!!

[hypertoxic]

Haha, please. You could not 8e any further from a god if you tried.
And I should know!

[worldwarnick]

What, are you some kind of god expert or something? Is that even a thing?

Anyway I just talked to a zombie, so nothing you can say to me about anything will make sense ANYWAY!