Audio

[lightmyfire]

A-alright I don't know who decided to take the joke this far but the crack about me being an insignificant character hasn't been relevant for at least four plot arcs! Come on! If this is just another weird virtual A-T training, I get it. It wouldn't be the first time I've woken up in some weird-ass place... but this full-immersion shit is really pushing it. Calling a guy fictional really isn't funny when... well, it's just not. Just because someone exists in a different reality or medium or... whatever. Doesn't mean they're not real...

Comments

[fuckincakewake]

lol hes not wearin short shorts and waving around phallic firearms
so ofc hes not ur type
overthinkin blond with a penchant for accessories hmmmmmmmmmmmmm whos type is that i wonder

[existechialism]

Striders are hot commodities.
Like the last cookie in the cookie jar. Everyone wants a bite.
Even more now that the market's down one Strider.

[fuckincakewake]

tbh u bein a gaymo doesnt change that we have a total mad set of striderz here
supply&demand tho
u cant hop off the Strider supply chain
esp since i know ur not datin anybody rn

[existechialism]

That's kind of the point.
Not dating anyone, I mean.

[fuckincakewake]

well
wait seriosuly ur off the market bc u arent datin
that makin all the kinda sense that doesnt
ur the one who told me 2 get out there and date
u could take ur own advice
uh if u wanted

[existechialism]

I don't.

[fuckincakewake]

oh is this 1 of those new strider vows of celibacy?

[existechialism]

"One of those"?
It's not really new.

[fuckincakewake]

ok cept i refuse to acknowledge its existence
if there are only 2 ppl in the world and 1 of them doesnt see somethin
is it still there?
this about english huh

[existechialism]

No.
Not the way you think.
This is about me.

oh hell no

[fuckincakewake]

nah thats impossible
bc if it was about u
like if u were fussed about something
you literally live next door to ur bff who digs u and has dug it since we were grubs
platonically 2
and she would drop everythin drop all the dates like they were piping scorchin hot
if u needed to talk about issues u were havin bc u bein sad or bummed or whatever is ultra shitty
almost as shitty as u feelin those things and shuttin her out about that
so theres no way thats what this is about rite?

[existechialism]

... No.
I'm just not ready for a relationship.
That's all.

[fuckincakewake]

dont flashstep when im tryin to throw pillows at ur head!!
u deserve a fluffy clobberin

[fuckincakewake]

and ok
if thats all this is no biggie
im datin enough for everybody
if u dun wanna or arent ready im not gonna make u
its just teasin
like if i really wanted to brain u id put bricks in the pillows
ur ok rite?

[existechialism]

Sorry.
I didn't want to pierce the pillow on the righteous angularity of my shades.

[ironicusername]

Thanks, Rox.
I'm fine.

private

[ironicusername]

It's not a big deal.
Jake and I just don't work out.

private

[fuckincakewake]

is that what he said?
like u told him and he said no thax
or are u just assumin per the usus
usual
how the fuck do u write out that abbrev

Re: private

[existechialism]

Neither.
As in, we dated for a few months and it didn't work out.
And I dunno, you could probably slang it up. "The uzze" or "yooze".

private

[fuckincakewake]

oh
hey i gotta show u something
i learned it from our ectobbs
check it

[fuckincakewake]

private

[fuckincakewake]

sorry
i shouldve noticed
this wasnt the norm distri caginess huh

Re: private

[existechialism]

It's not a big deal.
This shit happens, yo.
That's what being a teenager is all about.
Getting all flushed up with nowhere to go.

private

[fuckincakewake]

still sucks tho

Re: private

[existechialism]

... Yeah.
I guess,
It kinda does.