They really should accept me to fucking MENSA already.

[reanimated]

Oi, New Moore.

Let's play a game!

SHAG/MARRY/CLIFF
or
FUCK/MARRY/KILL
whichever you prefer, really.

You answer completely honestly and then leave your own triad and everyone else answers you and we fuck ourselves over for the conceivable rest of eternity.

Look, I'll even make the first one easy: Ramona, Shepard and that shifty forest bint, Aisling.

Comments

[quarkylass]

Of Loki or Karkat?

[ohmycod]

Karkat.







FUCK.

[quarkylass]

Okay, you can have karkat and I will leave the 'shag' option open!

[ohmycod]

Good. If anyone's shaggin' Karkat it's mfighojfghgfh--

[ she has shoved her device into her mouth ]

TEXT REPLIES FROM NOW UNTIL FOREVER BECAUSE HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

[ihateyouetc]

WHAT THE ACTUAL HEAVING FUCK IS GOING ON HERE.
WHO ARE YOU EVEN.

[ohmycod]

KARKAT!!! 38D

[ohmycod]

wait

[ohmycod]

fuck you just

what do you mean who are you even
its meenah
yknow

[ihateyouetc]

NOT A FUCKING CLUE.
NORMALLY I MIGHT WRITE SOME MORE BULLSHIT HERE AND GO ON A HUGE TANGENT ABOUT HOW I HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE AND RELATE THE TANGENT TO THE HUMAN WIGGLER TELEVISION PROGRAM THAT SUPPOSEDLY TEACHES UGLY HUMAN WIGGLER BABIES HOW TO DEDUCE SIMPLE THINGS WITH THE ASSISTANCE OF AN UGLY BLUE BARKBEAST BECAUSE THE ADULT HUMAN MALE DEPICTED COULDN'T FUNCTION WELL ENOUGH TO FIND HIS HIS WAY OUT OF A CORNER
BUT TO BE HONEST I DON'T REALLY FEEL LIKE DOING THAT TODAY AND GIVEN CONVERSATIONS I REMEMBER WHERE THE OTHER HUMANS MENTIONED TROLLS I HADN'T HEARD ABOUT BEFORE
I CAN MAKE A PRETTY GOOD GUESS.

[ihateyouetc]

SORRY. I'M KINDA BEHIND ON THE ALPHA TIMELINE.

[ohmycod]

[ She is genuinely sad. It is so hard for her to make friends, especially with people she WANTS to be friends with, so managing to do that with Karkat once was basically a miracle. ]

oh uh
huh

1/4

[ihateyouetc]

MAN, THIS IS KIND OF AWKWARD.
ESPECIALLY SINCE I KNOW FIRSTHAND IT'S REALLY SHITTY TO HEAR STUFF LIKE THAT.
I DIDN'T WANT TO HAVE TO DO THAT TO ANYONE ELSE.

[ihateyouetc]

IT HAPPENS TO ME EVERY TIME I GET CLOSER TO MY OTHER FRIENDS WHO I WASN'T REALLY THAT CLOSE WITH BEFORE
AND THEY DISAPPEAR FROM THIS PLACE
AND THEN THEY REAPPEAR WITH NO FUCKING MEMORY OF WHAT HAPPENED.
IT'S LIKE STARTING OVER EVERY SINGLE TIME.

[ihateyouetc]

IT COMPLETELY FUCKING SUCKS!

[ihateyouetc]

HEY, YOU WERE FRIENDS WITH FUTURE ME, RIGHT?
IF I'M BEING OBJECTIVELY HONEST FUTURE ME ISN'T THAT MUCH DIFFERENT FROM CURRENT ME SINCE EVERY ITERATION OF ME IS AN ASSHOLE
SO EVEN IF I HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE RIGHT NOW, WHATEVER.
IT'S NO BIG DEAL. YOU'RE PROBABLY PRETTY COOL.
YOU'LL JUST HAVE TO CATCH ME UP ON WHAT HAPPENED.

[ohmycod]

reely???
youd want to get to know me again
even with all this hullabeluga goin on

[ihateyouetc]

YEAH? I MEAN I CAN'T SEE HOW THIS WILL NEGATIVELY IMPACT ME IN THE FUTURE
EVEN THOUGH I USUALLY SAY THAT RIGHT BEFORE SOMETHING HAPPENS THAT NEGATIVELY IMPACTS ME IN THE FUTURE
BUT IT'S NOT LIKE I'M NOT SAYING INCRIMINATING SHIT LEFT AND RIGHT
SO WHY THE FUCK NOT.

[ohmycod]

KARKAT!!! 38D
youre fuckin awesome shouty
the names meenah and youre totally in my krill lord english army
im the condesce and i made you my grand threshecutioner!!! 38D

1/SEVERAL AGAIN

[ihateyouetc]

WHAT

[ihateyouetc]

SHIT.
I KNOW YOU'RE NOT LYING SINCE YOU CAN'T
AND IF I START TRYING TO LIKE
NOT DENY EVERYTHING THAT'S HAPPENED ON THIS FUCKED UP ISLAND SO FAR
I KNOW OBJECTIVELY EVERYONE'S ANCESTORS ACTUALLY EXISTED
BUT YOU'RE
AS IN FEFERI'S

[ihateyouetc]

SO I HAVE

[ihateyouetc]

FUCK
YOU KNOW WHAT
I DON'T EVEN WANT TO ASK ABOUT IT SO FORGET IT.

OK DONE.

[ihateyouetc]

YOU MADE A FUCKING EXCELLENT DECISION BY APPOINTING ME GRAND THRESHECUTIONER THOUGH SO WE SHOULD GET ALONG GREAT!
MAYBE FUTURE ME DIDN'T FUCK EVERYTHING UP SINCE HE HAD ENOUGH SENSE TO LAND THAT SWEET DEAL.
THAT'S WAS ALWAYS A THING I KINDA HOPED WOULD HAPPEN
LIKE IF WE HADN'T PLAYED THE GAME AND IF OUR VERSION OF THE CONDESCE WOULDN'T HAVE HAD ME CULLED ON SIGHT.

[ohmycod]

if your question was gonna be aboat your ancestor uh
youre doin us both a favor not askin that so dont
ever

anemoneway )(--ELL Y--EAH
makin excellent decisions are what kickbass leaders do and thats what i am
even if its reelly hard
and usually unrewarding
but hell yeah peixes and vantas teamup is back in action!!! 38D

1/4 FINALLY I AM SLOW AS FUCK SORRY.

[ihateyouetc]

YEAH IT WAS. I DECIDED I DON'T REALLY CARE.
I MEAN DON'T GET ME WRONG, I'M MILDLY CURIOUS? JUST NOT ENOUGH TO PURSUE IT BECAUSE I AM PERFECTLY FUCKING CONTENT LIVING IN ABSOLUTE IGNORANCE OF WHATEVER IS GOING ON WITH THAT UNTIL I'M INEVITABLY FORCED TO CONFRONT IT HEAD ON BECAUSE THAT'S BASICALLY HOW I DEAL WITH THE THINGS I DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH
BY PUTTING THEM OFF UNTIL THE LAST MINUTE WHEN EVERYTHING HAS THE HIGHEST POTENTIAL TO BITE THE FUCK OUT OF ME AND EVERYONE ELSE AROUND ME WHEN I COULD HAVE AVOIDED THE WHOLE DEBACLE BY PREPARING MYSELF FOR IT IN ADVANCE.