PRETEND I POSTED THIS 10/18/12 BECAUSE I MEANT TO AND I FORGOT.

[ihateyouetc]

OK, OK.
I KNOW THE OTHER NAMES I PICKED WERE KIND OF STUPID.
ESPECIALLY TROLL SARAH JESSICA PARKER.
I MEAN HOLY SHIT.
WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING???
WHY DID I HAVE AN OPINION ON HER AND SARAH JESSICA PARKER?
I DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT HER.
I'M NOT GOING TO INSULT HER OR ANYTHING BUT I THINK I WAS JUST BEING CONTRARY.
ANYWAY I KNOW YOU STOPPED LISTENING TO ME BUT HEAR ME OUT ON THIS ONE.
I THINK I'VE GOT IT THIS TIME.
WHAT ABOUT DREW BARRYMORE.

Comments

[ihateyouetc]

YEAH, WELL. IT'S NOT.
IT'S A GIRL'S NAME TOO. IT'S THE SAME CASE WITH THE NAME OF JOHN'S SALAMANDER.
WHICH, BY THE WAY, I'M PRETTY SURE IS A BOY EVEN THOUGH HE KEEPS CALLING IT A "HER" AND ALSO HIS "DAUGHTER."

[thneed]

'Drew' and 'Barry' seem manly, is all. Hm.

Is it a boy? Maybe the salamander feels more like a 'she' and he's respecting its self-image. That or he doesn't know how to tell boy and girls apart. I think the trick is in the tail length or something...

1/3

[ihateyouetc]

OK, AS AWESOME AS THAT WOULD BE FOR THINGS LIKE "RESPECTING AN INDIVIDUAL'S RIGHT TO BE THEMSELVES REGARDLESS OF THEIR PHYSICAL GENDER" AND WHAT NOT, THERE'S THIS ONE TINY THING THAT MESSES ALL THAT REALLY GREAT STUFF UP.

[ihateyouetc]

IT'S A FUCKING SALAMANDER. THEY AREN'T THAT COMPLICATED.

[ihateyouetc]

I'M GOING TO HAZARD A GUESS AND SAY HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO TELL THEM APART.

[thneed]

That's probably it.

[ihateyouetc]

THERE'S NO "PROBABLY" ABOUT IT.
HE ISN'T EVEN INTERESTED IN FIGURING OUT HOW.
HE JUST "KNOWS" IT'S A GIRL.

[thneed]

No salamander mind-reading powers or anything up his sleeve?

[ihateyouetc]

PRETTY SURE THE ONLY THING HE DOES OTHER THAN DIE IS MAKE THINGS REALLY, REALLY WINDY.
THAT DOESN'T EXACTLY LEND ITSELF TO DISCERNING THE GENDER OF A SPECIES THAT COMMUNICATES LARGELY BY BLOWING BUBBLES AND STARING AT YOU VACANTLY.
I DON'T THINK ANYTHING DOES. YOU COULD TALK TO THEM BUT THEY PROBABLY WOULDN'T GIVE YOU ANYTHING REMOTELY RESEMBLING A COHERENT ANSWER.
IN RETROSPECT, I DON'T SEE WHY ANYBODY THOUGHT CONSORTS WOULD HELP THEM WITH ANYTHING.
WE PROBABLY COULD HAVE OBTAINED ALL THE INFORMATION WE NEEDED WITHOUT BOTHERING TOO MUCH WITH THEM.
HONESTLY, MOST OF THEM ARE KIND OF STUPID.

[thneed]

What exactly where you doing that you guys needed salamander consorts? Learning to hide under rocks?

[maiditoutalive]

wow i really should have spent more time trying to explain the game to you if thats what you think

[riseup]

haha, fuck you.

[ihateyouetc]

DAMN! WHAT AN ACCOMPLISHED RETORT.
THAT DEFINITELY PROVES ME WRONG.
OH WAIT.

[ihateyouetc]

WHATEVER. YOU DON'T HAVE ROOM TO SAY SHIT ABOUT THIS FOR ALL THE FECULENCE YOU'VE BEEN UBIQUITOUSLY SPRITZING REGARDING THE FAKE HUMAN WIGGLERS.

[riseup]

casey is a living and breathing creature.
stupid baby dolls aren't.

SORRY EVERYONE WHO READS THIS COMMENT EVER.

[ihateyouetc]

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST SAID THAT ABOUT ROBOTS.
THAT'S NOT VERY CULTURALLY SENSITIVE, JOHN.
IN FACT, IT'S FUCKING RACIST.
VICTOR'S A ROBOT.

[riseup]

i think casey is a girl and rose thinks casey is a boy.
she also calls casey viceroy.
basically, we are letting casey be whoever casey wants to be.

[thneed]

Casey is one of those both-way names anyway.

[riseup]

exactly!
even though she is totally my daughter.

[thneed]

I'm sure you make a fine salamander parent.

[roseate]

It's Viceroy Bubbles von Salamancer.

[riseup]

whatever, same difference.
she is going to be a ghostbuster for halloween either way.

[roseate]

A tiny grey jumpsuit.
How dashing.

[thneed]

That's such an important-sounding name.

[roseate]

He had a very important job.