I've got a few questions!

Have you all seen this place?

Why are the beaches here empty?

And who wants to go swimming?

Hello?  Is anyone reading this?

...Oracle?

I have absolutely no idea where I am right now.

[ The video camera clicks on, but for a moment is obscured, save a close-up shot of a pair of ankles; it looks as if someone may be attempting to reach something high up on the wall and is standing on the laptop for additional height. The whole setup wobbles dangerously for a moment, and a voice can be heard. ]

---if you would just hold me steady..

[ No one does, but between the speaker's legs a much younger Poland can be seen in a cape and armor sitting on the floor staring interestedly up past the camera. The speaker lets out a yelp and jumps down, landing on the floor as assorted books and plates crash around him. As expected, it's a very young, becaped, and somewhat less-put-upon looking Lithuania, who wheels, looking frustrated, then sighs and sits down across from his friend, lecturing, ]

I told you, even if we don't know our current location, the presence of booby traps clearly shows that we're in unfriendly territory. There's nothing to do besides set some of our own, but you know I can't reach the high spots, so for once would you --

[ The computer beeps and both countries whirl to face the camera; for a split second a sword whizzes toward the screen, then the video feed cuts out. [

Okay, I've been trying to figure this out for hours now and... I've got a few questions, for whoever is listening.

1) Where the fuck is New Moore? Apparently it's an island and apparently it's here but how did I get here?!
2) Why am I looking for a part time job, and why do I only have night jobs circled??? I know I like black but it's not like I'm some demon of the night.

and the most important--

3) WHY ARE THERE BAGS OF BLOOD IN THE FRIDGE

I'm kind of freaking out. Apparently I have a roommate but... What if those bags are his?!

I've barricaded myself in my room just in case. Help. I'm living with a mass murderer.

Maybe if I go back to sleep now, I'll wake up and find out this was just some strange, drug-induced dream.

this place blows.

gimme something to work with. booze? babes? parties? c'mon.



and what the hell is up with these curtains?

Ha.... haha.... verrrrryyyy funny!! That's hiiiiilllllllllllllarious! Seerrrriously!!

[Something's up with Yosuke's voice. His voice sounds... tired, somehow, more careworn. And very, very drunk.]

No, really, stealing the boss's keys n' giving him fakes, huh?? 's good man, I bet you think you're pretty funny, huh?

[His tone, which until this point had been tight but flippant, veers suddenly and without warning into anger.]

.. Well you're NOT. It's NOT FUCKING FUNNY, so give me back my FUCKING OFFICE KEYS you little highschool shits!! Y'think you're hot shit cuz you're young 'n you think the rules don't apply to you - you think a-FUCKING-gain!

THIS...... THIS is.....



this is the REAL world, and you think you're so great.... someday you're gonna wake up'n you'll be thirty... with some frigid cunt of a wife 'n a kid you don't know how t'talk to..... 'n every day you gotta drag your ass outta bed and deal with little FUCK-UPS like you used to be stealin' your KEYS when you just wanna--


... jus' wanna sleep....




[His voice breaks as he trails off and there is a soft, choked sound like a sob muffled in the palm of someone's hand. After a moment there's the resigned "thud" of someone giving in to gravity and settling down on the floor for the long haul.]



..... Fuck it. I'm goin' back to the seasons. I'll be in the bar, so just.... bring 'em back, okay?