Okay, I'll be honest, being told I'm not real? Not the weirdest thing I've had to deal with. But it ranks pretty high up there. No one actually believes this, right?

Anyway, I was told that people I know might be here? So, uh, if you can hear me, sound off?

Listen up guys! Commander Shepard just informed me that Spain, Belarus, and Sweden all just got released. It looks like we're being targeted, so if any of you wanna head over to the station, you'll be safe there. I'll be there tomorrow morning, tonight I'm gonna be at Ukraine's just in case.

Litwa is here!!!!!!!!

Ї'vє вёёи тнє vїcтїм оf тоо мaиу jокє$ то вєlїєvё тнї$. Ї caи тнїйк оf моґє тнaй З мїllїои pєоplё тнaт'vё киоши Ї'м яёal тнёїґ щноlє lїfё. Tнї$ ї$и'т a gяёaт тїмё fоя $їllу тнїиg$, plєa$ё! Pцт мє Ьacк.

Ї caй'т єvєй ґєad щнaт Ї'м туpїиg, Ї яёallу dоцЬт уоц'll вё aвlё то ёїтнёя. Ї'м $оґґу, вцт Ї caи'т fїж їт, Ї'd lїкё $омєтнїиg єl$є то cоммцйїcaтє шїтн plєa$є! Tнё Cуґїllїc ї$ jц$т їй$цlтїйg. Tнє воldїйg ї$ jц$т aииоуїиg...Caй $омєоиє моґє тёcн $avvу нёlp щїтн тнї$?

Dante,

Sorry for cleaning without your and Alois' permission! Since I managed to arrive home before you both somehow, I thought I might as well put myself to use while I could manage while staying out of your hair.

I took the liberty of putting the miscellaneous items I found into boxes based on probable owner. They are all labeled and in your room. I did dirty laundry as well. I admit I am still kind of baffled by the four hundred unopened boxes of fake eyelashes. But I'd never have thrown anything away, don't worry!

At least the carpet isn't sticky anymore!!

PS. Poland:
WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE IF WE WEREN'T IMMORTAL ANYMORE

I am not getting on a large boat again.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN I HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL NEXT WEEK

I AM TOTALLY CONFUSED BUT THAT BOY IS VERY MUCH IN PAIN

A FATHER THAT WON'T CLAIM HIM

HE WAS HIT BY A CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

THEY CAN'T KILL HIM RIGHT

THIS IS ONLY THE FIRST TWO EPISODES



KOREA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY PERSON I WILL EVER MARRY IS BIG BROTHER.

Don't listen to Poland, he's a liar! This island is part of the Swedish Empire!

We're a lot nicer, and we're not afraid of storms or anything in the whole world.

WE ARE THE POLISH-LITHUANIAN COMMONWEALTH AND WE ARE HERE TO BE YOUR NEW MASTERS





AS SOON AS THIS LIGHTNING STORM STOPS BECAUSE IT IS LIKE MAD SCARY

If you check in downtown, it looks like they have temporary housing assignments for everyone, so you don't need to worry about where to stay.

You should still be careful, though.  Some of the places are booby-trapped.

[ The video camera clicks on, but for a moment is obscured, save a close-up shot of a pair of ankles; it looks as if someone may be attempting to reach something high up on the wall and is standing on the laptop for additional height. The whole setup wobbles dangerously for a moment, and a voice can be heard. ]

---if you would just hold me steady..

[ No one does, but between the speaker's legs a much younger Poland can be seen in a cape and armor sitting on the floor staring interestedly up past the camera. The speaker lets out a yelp and jumps down, landing on the floor as assorted books and plates crash around him. As expected, it's a very young, becaped, and somewhat less-put-upon looking Lithuania, who wheels, looking frustrated, then sighs and sits down across from his friend, lecturing, ]

I told you, even if we don't know our current location, the presence of booby traps clearly shows that we're in unfriendly territory. There's nothing to do besides set some of our own, but you know I can't reach the high spots, so for once would you --

[ The computer beeps and both countries whirl to face the camera; for a split second a sword whizzes toward the screen, then the video feed cuts out. [

That's the fifth plate I've dropped today.

Dante, I'd recommend you and your friend stay out of the kitchen for an hour or so. At least until I've finished cleaning up.

Post Edited at 16:07 04/01/2011
SIX IS THIS A JOKE. DID SOMEONE GREASE THESE. POLAND I TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT TIME IN AMERICA'S HOUSE IN STRICT CONFIDENCE AND YOU KNOW APRIL FIRST MAKES ME NERVOUS

Ooohh O~K~❀~

B/C a place to put shitty laundry in's a great&awesome idea when you ☆~♥~✿~♥~never wash any of it~♥~✿~♥~☆

Mr. Drake, please let me know if Poland and I are inconveniencing you by spending time in the common room so late, especially when you make such an effort to be discreet about coming home. In the future we'll be sure to keep the lights on and stay off of the floor, as I'm sure tripping over us when you came in was the last thing any of us was really hoping would happen.

I do not know why I am not home yet. This place is a nuisance.


And I do not know why people are complaining about the stipends. It is decent money. Hmph.

I need a job, or else something to do. Frankly, though, it's kind of amazing how difficult it is to write up a resume for the particular skillset we've got.

I suppose I could just do the housekeeping thing like before... it'd be nice to have someone to cook for again.