We should talk.

Who: Artemis & Souji
When: a day after the invitations go out?
Where: Juane's
What: Souji invites Artemis to the dance.
Warnings: This is going to be awkward as anything.


( we could be movers or we could be shakers )

So it actually took this long to get the computer up and running again.

Tim. Everybody. I'm really sorry for that thing I posted. What I did. There is literally no way to talk about this without sounding like a bigger culo than I already am, so can we skip to the part where everyone is mad at me or something?

... I don't remember all of that, but sorry to everyone I punched in the face. Or hit with hard things. Or - you get the idea.

I feel like I've been giving off the wrong impression since I got here. I just want to make sure you all know I normally only punch confirmed bad people, not just... anyone I see.

[ ooc: Artemis was on fear, and as her response to fear is 'HIT IT IN THE FACE' she probably assaulted several people before she made it to a safe place and hid. Feel free to assume she ran into your character while in that state and terrible things happened. ]

Yo, Tim. Was just browsing some of your files and I was wondering if you could tell me what all this was?









You know. In the spirit of Valentines and all.

So in my first month in New Moore, we've had meteors that aren't actually meteors, talking rabbits, and trying to incite revolution. You sure know how to make a guy feel welcome, city- and provide him with lots of fodder for his fiction and many excuses to watch and eat popcorn. Cheers to you.

WHO: Artemis & Yosuke
WHAT: Stockroom shenanigans aw yeah.
WHEN: Jan 31st.
WHERE: Juane's stockroom.
WARNINGS: Don't think so, will edit if necessary.

( drew the weapons, read the rules )

So let me get this straight....

... Armageddon breaks out while I'm on shift, and I'm left short-staffed to deal with the looters...

... A crazed gunman shows up and starts shooting up electronics, destroying thousands of dollars in merchandise and nearly killing me in the process - I had to take him out with a monkey wrench - and...

... Somehow, I'm the one getting written up for "striking a customer while representing the brand" and being saddled with a whole freaking month of stockroom duty???


Will somebody please explain to me how this is fair?? Because right now, I'm starting to think the world really did end after all, and we were just sucked into the Twilight Zone, or something....

bet everybody who's against anybody doing stuff to property's got a ticket & nothing better to worry about till they escape.

WHO: Anybody
WHAT: Looting
WHEN: Jan. 13-16
WHERE: All over town
WARNINGS: Violence.
NOTES: I'm going to open this up to everybody who wants to action out the looting parts of the crisis. How this goes! Do you want to participate in looting plots? Just start a thread, probably mention the date & place, mark it open if you want everyone to drop by or closed if you want to play out something with just one other person, and go from there. Reply to other people's threads! Looting and vigilante shenanigans is what I'm saying. Uh, also please note that if you mark it open and you are looting stuff that is like saying 'hey people keeping the peace please come beat me up!'

Looting has gripped the town, everyone's essentially going crazy, and keeping the peace has fallen to, who knows why, whatever Fictionals have decided to try to keep the peace. Nobody said the end of the world was going to be fun.

There's got to be something we can do. I feel like if there were real superheroes here, they'd know how to fix this.

Christ, has it really been nearly a year since I last did this? Time flies when you're trapped in the Bermuda fucking Triangle, man. I figured it's time for me to have another go at this list cos I've done quite a bit of growing and a bloody huge bit of dying since I've been here. Cheers to that I suppose.

ACCOMPLISHED:
-- Took a nasty spill, impaled by metal fence (chest)
-- Met a shapeshifter bitch, impaled by exposed lavatory pipe (stomach)
-- Savagely beaten in the toilets (blunt force trauma I think it's called? Ask lady-boy cop lady-boy cop proved unhelpful)
-- Smoke inhalation (not a pleasant way to go, for the record)
-- Took a nasty spill, broke neck on stairs
-- Took a nasty spill, fell in gutter (that was a shite weekend)
-- Electrocution, multiple times (this was on the "do it to impress the ladies" list last year, suffice to say it doesn't)
-- Dismembered limb from limb (apparently regeneration does work)
-- Strangled (by other, not self)
-- Disemboweled (NOT. PLEASANT.)
-- Probably loads of other ways, my memories get a bit hazy around that time
-- Drowned during the cruise from hell (in my defence, I was twatted)
-- Does dying in dreams count? Cos Robocop's mum stabbed me
-- Attacked by "shadows" while rescuing Spain from himself (YOU'RE WELCOME)
-- Turned into a zombie on Halloween
-- Bled to death after having cock cut off (YES THIS HAPPENED, YES BELARUS IS STILL ROAMING THE STREETS A FREE WOMAN, WHAT THE FUCK!)

SEEMS LIKE IT'D BE FUN, SHOULD HAVE A GO:
-- Erotic asphyxiation
-- Hanging (I hear it gives you a hard-on! STILL UNCONFIRMED FROM LAST YEAR but no one denied it at least.)
-- Aeroplane crash (what are the odds in this place. Unless those American wankers show up? Y'know the ones on the island.)
-- Overdose

WOULD DO IT TO IMPRESS THE LADIES:
-- Shoot self in the head
-- Something heroic I guess

FUCK NO:
-- Cannibalism
-- Anything involving that bullshit television world ever again
-- Drinking bleach (you aliens are still so incredibly stupid)


Resolutions: only die in impressive ways from now on, NO MORE GHOSTS, quit smoking, find God, build an orphanage, wouldn't it be funny if I was actually serious about these?

As housemaid or servant of All-works. From London, educated in English and French, with experience as lady's maid. Hard-working, single, possessing of good character. 8 months at previous employment, fee negotiable. East Building, room 301.

[Hey New Moore, have an Artemis again. She's even looking slightly pleasant, what do you know. Also the video is bouncing slightly - she's walking in a park, wearing normal people clothes and carrying a backpack.]

So, I need money, which means I need a job. I've looked around and done some odd lifting and carrying jobs, but I don't really have any - marketable talents other than being athletic. Anyone know of an opening for a highschool-grunt type job? I could probably do fast food, or a grocery store, or something. 

[She's come to a stop. Putting the phone on the ground, she sits down beside it and starts stretching. In the background is a sign indicating the start of the park's mile-long running loop.]

So yeah. Any recommendations?

And I wanted to say thanks to those of you who helped me get settled in. I - really appreciate it.

[And she reaches over to click it off.]

WHEN: New Years' Night.
WHERE: Miscellaneous rooftops and alleyways.
WHAT: Tim goes on patrol.
WHO: Red Robin, Artemis, and anyone else who prowls the roofs at night is welcome to join.

The snow was starting to melt. It made running around on the rooftops a little warmer, but a lot more dangerous. That was probably part of the appeal. Tim still made nightly patrols, but they'd gotten shorter and shorter for months now -- after Jason left; after Cass vanished... crime wasn't high enough on the island for there to be much of a point. Maybe once a week, he stopped a mugging, but other than that, it had become just a quick, hour-long prowl, exercise and training and looking out to see if anything newer and stranger had taken over the island.

For the last week, he'd been out three or four hours every night. It wasn't that he needed to clear his head. Or at least, it wasn't just that.

There was someone else out here too -- and whoever it was didn't answer on the radio frequencies he shared with Steph and Torchwood. So every night, he made another try at this little game of cat and mouse -- bat and bird? -- trying to get a closer look.

Y'know, I always thought the whole "key to the city" bullshit was only for movies but apparently not!

THINGS ARE THAT ARE NOW ILLEGAL IN NEW MOORE: Murder, being a boring sod

THINGS THAT ARE NOW LEGAL IN NEW MOORE: Everything else!

FIRST ORDINANCE: In t-minus 60 I'm turning this shite government building into a mandatory party, we're all getting twatted and not participating is a punishable offence or something. Oi lawyer guy, you're in charge of that part! I'm busy doing important kingly shit like locating a keg or five thousand.

WHO: Artemis & You
WHAT: Mistletoe. Sucks.
WHEN: Dec. 21st-23rd
WHERE: Roundabouts town! Artemis is job hunting / exploring so anywhere works.
WARNINGS: Probably none. Uh, smooching? Possibly violence afterwards, if Artemis is pissed enough.

She has to find a job, get money, and give Steph her clothes back. Also, it would just in general be awesome if she had money. It's pretty important. 

[Artemis will be out and about the city, trying hard to find herself a job. Feel free to bump into her anytime in the day during those times, just note the time & place in the comment. She could be already trapped by mistletoe or it could grow over their heads while they're talking, doesn't matter. Prose or quick action log, doesn't matter to me.]

BEHOLD, PEOPLE OF NEW MOORE. LOOK UPON ME! LOOK UPON ZIM!

What filthy lies do these miserable monkeys tell to ZIM?! What is this nonsense of ‘Make-Believe’? TELL ME! I have been informed by these so-called ‘Authorities’ that I am a work of human fiction? NONSENSE! They speak only lies and cannot be trusted. This I see now, and I must first set up my base of-

My... My new home. Hoooo Boy. Moving sure is hard. What a totally horrible inconvenience in my completely normal Earth-maggot life, this moving is. Yes. That sounds adequate, indeed.