All around weird things? Sort of the norm for me. This place takes a whole flotilla of cakes which I'm guessing is what you guys hear pretty much every time there's a fresh face here.

[ So Buffy switches gears. ]

So hi. Freshest face reporting. I'm Buffy Summers and I'm going to be more willing to believe this whole thing the second I get through a nice long talk with Scooby Doo or Harry Potter. Honestly, I'll even take that guy from The Matrix.

Oh, and if anyone sees a wooden stake lying around could you just do me a favor and toss it my way?

[ Not because she thinks she'll be meeting any vampires, but she dropped it somewhere and she'd really like at least one thing to remind her of home. It's not like she had a ton on her when she ended up here. Otherwise she really, really wouldn't ask publicly since she's still unsure about this whole thing. ]

[ And here's one Yuri Nakamura, wearing a princely outfit as she side-eyes the screen, looking pretty baffled by the situation. If only because wow, all of you people are acting completely insane. ]

Raise your hand if you're acting normal. And by normal, I mean, not acting Shakespearian or like those fairy tales in books.

I just want a count of hands to see how many of you idiots are still sane.

[There's a sound of clattering rubble and moving water as the camera turns on, and for a moment everything is dark, until Kyon stands up. His phone has fallen out of his pocket on a rock-strewn slope, a crevasse somewhere along the coast currently hissing with incoming tide-waters. As he moves out of the way of the camera, it's obvious he's moving toward a raised bier in the midst of the crevasse. On it, a girl with an elaborate gold crown, a poufy silk dress untouched by the current inclement conditions, and long dark hair in elaborate braids is lying, still and somnolent, a faint frown furrowing her sleeping features.]

Suzumiya-hime! Come on, rise and shine!

[The disheveled princeling calls out, voice alarmed as he surveys the rising waters, reaching forward to shake her by the shoulders when she doesn't immediately move. After a moment, looking back and forth in agitation, he slips his arm behind her shoulders and with a grunt of exertion lifts her off the stone, slinging her unceremoniously onto his back and running pell-mell for the slope as the sound of the water rises to a roar and a wave crashes along the bottom of the crevasse, washing out the slope behind him and dampening the bier with spray and foam. The next wave, coming while he's struggling laboriously, halfway back to his dropped phone, covers the stone she'd been laid on.

There's a hush while the water retreats, another, higher wave inevitable at this point, and, panting, Kyon falls to his knees and lets the girl carefully down on the ground, only a foot or two away from the camera.]

I guess... the curse... isn't as fake as I thought. Trust Suzumiya-hime to be a nuisance even sleeping, huh?

[He's panting, and his voice is weary and resigned.]

Maybe I should try slapping you, but as cathartic as it might be, I don't think it would work, and anyway... even coming close to that once is more than enough. That's not something that's going to happen again.

I guess...

[His voice still sounds reluctant, even over the building noise of the next wave.]

It's best to fall back on the traditional remedies at a time like this. Even if it's got the usual preconditions... I don't need to worry, do I?

Time to wake up.

[The wave begins to crash as he bends down to cover her mouth with his in a kiss, and the camera is just keen enough to show her eyes flickering, just barely beginning to open, the moment before the water sweeps the phone away.]

You have now endured a night with no moon. The seas lash and heave; the sky is dark, and there is a hole in it.

Still I say to you, be not afraid.

Fear is natural to you in the face of the unknown, the uncertain, and danger. Fear is a state of elevated awareness and cautious decision-making entered into in the face of risk; meant to enhance self-preservation.

Still I say to you, be not afraid.

The world is stranger than you have imagined it. If this witchcraft brings you fear, then it would be sensible to live in fear all the days of your life, because of the many mysteries of the world -- the things you do not know that you don't know.

Still I say to you, be not afraid.

You are watched, and you are protected. You will not be forsaken.

[ When the feed turns on, there's one bored Yuri Nakamura who has been ignoring things because everyone seems to be talking about the same damn thing. ]

Outside of the whole 'bunny fiasco', things here haven't been moving all that much lately. [ Or rather, she doesn't even remember anything crazy happening as of late. ] Anyway, I'm bored. If anyone has anything to talk about that isn't about these rabbits, bunnies, what have you, feel free to pitch in.

[ Aaand there's one more thing that she has to mention, since she hasn't managed to do it just yet. ]

Oh, and Haruhi? Kyon? If we're still doing that showdown, we should do it sometime next week once this mess has moved on.

Who's up for a barbecue?

[ There's one Yuri Nakamura on the screen, looking quite serious, almost as if she were going to give an announcement. And in fact, she is. Even though the announcement itself it directed at a certain specific person, there's no way that she's going to filter it to that person, and it's not because she's lazy. ]

Attention, everyone! For anyone who knows the person who goes by the name of 'Suzumiya Haruhi' or is Suzumiya Haruhi herself, I have an important announcement.

I plan on challenging you, Suzumiya, to a battle! If you accept my challenge, I'll give you the complete details about the battle.

As for everyone else who's listening in, if you want to be a referee, be my guest. Any questions, comments, and concerns from anyone else would be also appreciated.

OK so I've heard of the pearly gates, forty virgins, and I'm pretty sure one of the ones out there involves attaining enlightenment or inner peace or something - but I don't think I've ever heard of an afterlife that looks like a swanky hotel room and comes with a fully-stocked minibar. Scientology, maybe?

Oh and I was TOTALLY NOT OKAY for a second there, by the way, if anyone cared.

IF YOU'RE ALIVE, YOU ANSWER YOUR PHONE!

[ yes this is Ukraine's panicked mass roll-call for all her friends and babies in the wake of the OUTRIGHT INSANITY that is downtown. go. ]

[ There is one clearly annoyed teenage girl using the feed today, and she is annoyed. Then again, when isn't she? ]

Someone better tell me that seeing gray everywhere is normal.

[There is audio before the video appears: an obnoxious squawking voice that is mostly indistinct, but keeps repeating something about the spreading cases of lunar fever.

When the video finally does turn on, Harry can be seen fumbling with his device before finally setting it down. There is a bright crimson coloured parrot perched on his shoulder.]

I tried to catch an owl in the forest. I've never trained one myself, but I figured it wouldn't be very hard...

[Whether the scratches on his face are from the owl he tried to catch, or the parrot... well, we will leave that up to you to decide.]

Er.. it didn't work out.... This thing followed me home instead.

[He reaches up to scritch at its feathers and gets a nip on the hand for his efforts. Then, no matter how he tries to shoo it away, it clings to him and goes back to squawking.]

[ Yuri wasn't really into all that mushy crap. She was already dead, after all - not a ghost, but dead - so she didn't really care about romance. In fact, she hadn't thought about it for a very, very long time. ]

I can't believe I'm actually asking this, but... [ A dramatic sigh. ] What exactly do you guys do on a date?

[ She isn't expecting a second date, because this is a one time only deal, but still. She doesn't want her day to be dull and boring. Or full of romantic crap. ]

And the first person who says 'love hotel' or 'do nothing' will get a fist to their face personally.

Who: Everybody involved in the date auction fiasco awesomeness.
What: Dates! Dates all over! Willing dates. Begrudging dates. "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE" dates. "Who are you exactly?" dates. All sorts of dates, really.
When: The 14th mostly? May range outside of that if one person like the Once-ler has a whole bunch of dates to attend to.
Where: All over the place I'm sure. Probably to be determined by thread.

HEY SO here's a mass log. Here are your deets. The idea here is that the auctioned person will put up the thread starter, either with a scenario or just a note as to who they have dates with. Think like similar to the mistletoe mass log.

I don't know. This is terrible. Tag yoselves and GO YE FORTH.

You'd think it wouldn't take quite so much unseasonable weather for them to let us out of school, but at least they came to their senses eventually and let us out early, so I won't complain about it.


On a day like this, it makes me wish there was a fireplace to curl up in front of...

It's so clooooooooooooooooooose! [Don't mind the small fangirl freakout okay.]

Valentine's Day is only nine days away, people! Nine days to find that perfect gift for your special someone! This is the perfect time of year to confess your feelings to your true love!

Now, if you need some help, I'd gladly offer my expertise on the matter! My friends don't call me the Goddess of Love for nothing! [She taps the side of her nose.] I've got a knack for true love!

Did anyone get sick after everyone was done being sick? Just me? [ uggh ] It feels like there's smallish bees up my nose.-- Anyway!

First order of business: Dave and Gamzee get promotions for somehow increasing business with redesign that I didn't give permission for. ...But there's no positions to move up to because you're my only employees so uh- Raises for everyone! And Dave is employee of the month. Again.

Second: Does anyone want a job? You can help with pizza business or thneed business or business in general. I could use some more hands on deck to keep up with orders. They're a little much sometimes. [ dante stop ordering 300 pizzas at once ]

Annnd Kaylee, can I hire you to help me build some stuff?

It seems that half a DeLorean has somehow found its way into our communal living area. Allow the past-further past-present-future-past-back to the future hijinks ensue.

I would like to say that it's much cooler then a colored box.