There's got to be something we can do. I feel like if there were real superheroes here, they'd know how to fix this.

I don't think I'm strong enough to throw a meteor. I dunno. I might be. It depends on how many big jugs'a soda I drink beforehand.

How can I figure this out without practicing first?

[The video cuts from static after a moment, showing an intimate close up of ZIM as he tries to adjust the computer. Behind him is clearly a rooftop and the sounds of rioting and looting somewhere in the city below.]

Eh? Is it on? Filthy primitive technology brings nothing but-

[ZIM looks into the camera and smiles, having caught himself. He clears his throat and leaps backward so that his whole diminutive body is in view. He is also standing next to what looks like a horrible ball of jagged scrap metal and bolts.]
( cut for length )

WHO: Anybody
WHAT: Looting
WHEN: Jan. 13-16
WHERE: All over town
WARNINGS: Violence.
NOTES: I'm going to open this up to everybody who wants to action out the looting parts of the crisis. How this goes! Do you want to participate in looting plots? Just start a thread, probably mention the date & place, mark it open if you want everyone to drop by or closed if you want to play out something with just one other person, and go from there. Reply to other people's threads! Looting and vigilante shenanigans is what I'm saying. Uh, also please note that if you mark it open and you are looting stuff that is like saying 'hey people keeping the peace please come beat me up!'

Looting has gripped the town, everyone's essentially going crazy, and keeping the peace has fallen to, who knows why, whatever Fictionals have decided to try to keep the peace. Nobody said the end of the world was going to be fun.

-Kung Fu movie marathon at my place!  EDIT:  We're going to have the marathon on Wednesday.  So you better all come over then!!

-Steak party!
-Wear an actual police uniform
-See how far I can kick something I think I bounced a football off the forcefield! It took eight tries, though.
-See what the biggest thing I can dropkick is  <- if it takes 8 tries, maybe not a good idea...
-Win a sparring match with someone from the advanced class
-Another thing that was on my list
-Something else I've never done before

So... movies at my place?

Ah... while I'm entirely unsure why I am the suitable person to be asking this...

Does anyone on this island have "super speed?"  Whether perceptions, reflexes, or simple velocity, I'm not sure, so anyone possessing any attribute that could be described as paranormal or inhuman levels of speed should speak up immediately.  Though it probably won't do any good, regardless.

An an entirely more important afterthought, if anyone is in possession of a plan to either save this world or escape it, or has some method of keeping safe during an event almost as dangerous as the extinction of the dinosaurs, I would humbly beg you to notify me immediately.

And to take me along.  Thank you.

Regardless of the existence of an escape rocket or the inevitability of the comet careening towards the planet, there is no excuse for property damage. Further attempts of ransacking buildings related to the public good- such as the police station or the hospital- will certainly be stopped by any means necessary. Please avoid further looting of the commercial districts as there are more than a fair few honest citizens willing to defend their private property.

Naturally, both Kanji and I will assist in defense of both the private and public places that might incur damage in the remaining days.

All right guys, just because we're at the eleventh hour doesn't mean we're allowed to start slacking off, here!! Come on! We've still got a whole 48 hours to think of a plan, there's still time.

We need to meet up. I'm sure we've got a couple of flats of energy drinks kicking around in the stockroom at Juanes, so let's meet up and go over our options again! Consider this a standing invite to anybody who doesn't plan on going down easy.

[tap tap tap. the sharp tip of a six-foot metallic blade nudges against the ground, knocking up a little dust. behind him is the sky, wide in its expanse, broken by the wide swing of the sword. he's holding the handle like a baseball bat, and he does it again, and again, like he's trying to hit a curve ball that keeps whizzing past his temple.]

Not a bad swing, huh?

[with a chuckle, he clicks his tongue and points a forefinger at the sky where the comet would be, thumb outstretched like a gun.]

Home run.